21 Signs Your Fraternity Won’t Be Around Much Longer

WJ Cope9 years ago

1. There are more rats than people living in your chapter house.

2. A sorority hasn’t done a social with you since 2013.

3. Legacies know not to seek out your house during rush.

4. You will literally take anyone with a pulse during recruitment.

5. Your university’s administration has most of your brothers’ personal phone numbers.

6. Even the creepy alums in their late 20s stop coming around.

7. Your president goes on a “vacation,” blocks everyone on social media, and never returns.

8. Your last rager drew four people, two of them homeless.

9. Your nationals rep has long stopped contacting you.

10. People from other chapters come to visit, but quickly change their plans and find an excuse to leave once they arrive.

11. You spot people coming by to survey the land your house is on.

12. One of your members holds seven different officer positions, because you only have nine members.

13. Your latest philanthropy event ended up losing hundreds of dollars.

14. Several of the rooms in your house are too toxic or dangerous to enter.

15. You used Comic Sans font for the text in your rush video.

16. Your treasurer has failed pre-calc three times.

17. You’re so in debt that you’ve considered asking for a bailout from nationals.

18. You’ve been on suspension for over 70% of the last decade.

19. The campus police know most of your members by name.

20. A national news outlet recently picked up on a false story about your chapter.

21. A plague swept over the land and your entire town is slowly being reclaimed by the wilderness, completely devoid of human life.

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