28 Halloween Costumes That Are Almost Guaranteed To Get You Laid

Halloween is in nine days, and something tells me you lazy losers still have no idea what you’re going to dress up as. That the case? Yeah, that’s definitely the case.

Lucky for you, I, in my infinite benevolence, have decided to sift through and select 28 of the best costume ideas out there. Sure, I may have faced having special privileges like “lunch” and “free oxygen” taken away from me at the office had I not completed this task, but I was going to do it anyways because I’m such a great guy.

My challenge for you is to come up with better costumes than these. What’s in it for you? If you submit your photo to our 2015 Halloween photo contest, you can win a free spring break trip for you and 3 of your buddies or some Rowdy Gentleman gift cards. Check it out.

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Ghillie suit
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Your fat pledge brother
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The Brazzers film crew
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The Founding Fratters
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Zach Mettenberger
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Captain Jack Sparrow
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Chubbs
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Dairy Wine cows
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“Because you’re the cup”
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Casual squirrels
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Mike Ditka squadron
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The Eiffel Tower
  1. RutherfordBeHazed

    Dress up as the intern for Halloween and you’re guaranteed not to get laid.

    9 years ago at 12:23 pm
    1. RonaldMcDonald

      I still don’t understand how the managed that. They must’ve both ate shit on that fall

      9 years ago at 3:24 pm
      1. RisingFratstarOfTX

        You see, they got together some chapter funds, and went out and bought an invisible car. Car makers have had them for years, but you gotta know the right people.

        9 years ago at 3:50 pm
  2. Back In My Days

    Despite these being comical, I don’t think we should give up on the option of taking away that lunch and free oxygen.

    9 years ago at 12:27 pm
    1. Shoeless Bro Jaxon

      That “lifeguard” is Wendy Fucking Peffercorn. Call her by her name!

      9 years ago at 9:09 am