17 Ugly Christmas Sweaters That Will Get You Laid This Holiday Season

Stop right there — you don’t have to do it. It’s nearly 2016 and there is no reason for you to re-use one of the random ugly Christmas sweaters that have been floating around your house for years. There are too many unknowns to safely put that thing on your person. It could be carrying a mutated strand of the AIDS virus or something.

Instead of giving yourself AIDS, check out the list we’ve built of frugly (frat ugly) Christmas sweaters that can be bought on Amazon, and shipped to the filthy, beer-stained fire hazard that you call home within two days. Our price estimates are based on ordering sweaters in size “Large,” as prices may vary by sweater size.

If you’re a student with a .edu email address, click this link [Amazon Prime Free Trial Membership] and apply for a FREE trial of Amazon Prime before proceeding. This step is important because Prime hooks up free 2-day shipping for your sweater so you’ll have it in time for this weekend.

Got your free Amazon Prime trial membership? Great, now let’s get ugly:

Hotline Bling – Drake Christmas Sweater – $19.95

MultiDrake
—

Snow’s Out – Ho’s Out Christmas Sweater – $29.99

Snow's Out

—

Chestnuts Roasting – Christmas Sweater – $34.99

Chestnuts Roasting

—

Beer – Christmas Sweater – $19.99

Beer

—

Grateful Bear – Christmas Sweater – $59.99

Grateful Bear

—

Stegosaurus Santa – Christmas Sweater – $29.99

Stegosaurus Santa

—

Death Star – Star Wars Christmas Sweater – $38.95

Death Star

—

Weed Santa – Christmas Sweater – $23.66

Weed Santa

—

Winter Is Coming – GOT Christmas Sweater – $22.99

GOT

—

Reindeer Bang – Christmas Sweater – $64.95

Reindeer Bang

—

Santa Klaus – Zoolander Christmas Sweater – $29.99

Santa Klaus

—

AR15 – Christmas Sweater – $34.98

AR Christmas

—

Deadlift Santa – Christmas Sweater – $29.99

Deadlift Santa

—

The Dude – Big Lebowski Christmas Sweater – $49.99

The Dude

—

PS4 – Christmas Sweater – $49.99

PS4

—

Guns N’ Roses – Christmas Sweater – $64.99

Guns N' Roses

—

Shitter’s Full – Christmas Vacation Sweater – $59.95

Shitter's Full

———————————————————————————————————————

Grandex Ugly Christmas Sweater Accessory Suggestions

Man Outfitters Logo

Man Outfitters Ugly Christmas Sweater Accessories:

Screen Shot 2015-12-08 at 10.25.12 AM

1. Filson Original Goat Skin Gloves

Screen Shot 2015-12-08 at 10.25.37 AM

2. Patagonia Synchilla Scarf

Screen Shot 2015-12-08 at 10.26.02 AM

3. Patagonia Beanie

Rowdy Dark Logo

Rowdy Gentleman Ugly Christmas Sweater Accessories:

Screen Shot 2015-12-08 at 10.27.29 AM

1. Sherpa Fleece Vest

Screen Shot 2015-12-08 at 10.27.48 AM

2. USA Beanie Hat

Screen Shot 2015-12-08 at 10.28.20 AM

3. Southwest Beanie Hat

We (Grandex) may receive commission for any purchases made through the above links.

  1. keg__atron69

    Hey, Intern. You’re not quite fitting in here, but check out The Chive. Their is a place for everyone!

    11 years ago at 4:18 pm
  2. TacBRO_Bell

    You could never fool jimmy with sponsored content that obvious. Step up your game.

    11 years ago at 6:03 pm