A Masturbating-Peeping-Tom-Tranny Is Terrorizing The University Of Texas Campus
Me to our interns about half an hour ago: “Will you guys help me search for news stories? It’s been kind of a slow day on the current events front. Get on it. K Thanks.”
Intern John: “Have you heard about the tranny that’s walking around UT campus terrorizing students?”
Me: “How could I, John? I don’t go to school there.”
Intern John: “He’s going around masturbating all over campus, and of course, he’s dressed as a woman. Not sure if he has a dick or vagina, though.”
Me: “Interesting. Prolly still has a penis. Doesn’t sound like the type of move a post-op would pull. They’re a little classier. You know what I mean?”
Intern John: “Yeah.”
Intern Nicole: “Yeah, word’s been spreading around campus. Everyone is freaked out a little bit. He’s also been peeping in people’s windows, scaring people and whatnot. Like a peeping tom.”
Me: “Is that right? Pretty fucked up.”
Intern Emily: “I know someone that came home from class one day and found him sleeping in their backyard.”
Me: “Well shit, guys. Is there anything else you’d like to share about this pervert?”
Interns: (in unison) “No.”
Me: “How long have you guys known about this?”
Intern John: “A couple weeks now.”
…or two weeks ago when the story was breaking. Good for nothing interns.
Here’s a screenshot of the conversation Intern John had with a buddy who encountered the tranny:
And here’s a photo of the tranny:
Lastly, here’s a note that a west campus apartment complex posted to warn its residents of the masturbating-peeping-tom-backyard-crashing-transvestite:
Head on a swivel, UT students.
[via our worthless interns]
Image via The Liberty Beat
That’s a pretty good disguise you’ve got in that picture, Dorn.
And to be fair, you’ve asked people if they wanted some lovin’ too, but they all turned you down.
11 years ago at 4:22 pmWho let Dorn’s mom out again?
11 years ago at 4:23 pm^Look at him, he’s trying.
11 years ago at 6:12 pmLooks like Dorn’s mom has been getting some sun
11 years ago at 4:23 pmSure Dorn. Just finding out about it now. Not two weeks ago when you decided to dress up in blackface and terrorize UT students.
11 years ago at 4:29 pmSo is Intern John the fuck up who takes forever to post Fail Friday?
11 years ago at 4:32 pmIt’s not my fault. Mr. Dorn doesn’t let me out of the basement till noon on Fridays
11 years ago at 5:10 pm^Awww something was done here
11 years ago at 5:37 pm^Really? I’m glad you pointed that out. I wasn’t sure.
11 years ago at 10:38 pmYou’re really just asking for it, aren’t you?
11 years ago at 4:33 pmMasturnating. TFM.
11 years ago at 4:36 pmKing Dorn just monkeying around.
11 years ago at 4:43 pmUT campus safety letters have improved since August of ’66.
11 years ago at 4:56 pmDorn’s diverse writing portfolio so far includes masterbating transvestites, elephant walking, and small children. Seems legit.
11 years ago at 5:03 pm