Amanda Bynes On Her Arresting Officer: “He Slapped My Vagina”

Man, I can’t help but love this chick. 100% entertainment, 100% of the time. A recent schtick of hers, and maybe my favorite from her repertoire, was basically calling all of her “haters” ugly on Twitter. You say she needs help? You’re ugly. You say she’s acting crazy. Boom. Ugly. You don’t like her new bleach blonde wig look? It’s because you’re stupid and ugly. It’s been fun to watch.

Now, after her recent arrest, she’s back behind a keyboard letting everyone know the real story about what went down. Here’s Amanda Bynes’ account of her arrest from earlier this week, via Twitter:

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One minute you’re just chilling in your New York City apartment, totally sober and minding your own business, opening up your window for some fresh air, then the next thing you know a police officer comes in and just slaps the hell out of your vagina.

It’s a scenario we’ve all seen play out many times before. I believe her. If you think she’s lying, you’re ugly.

[via Twitter]

Image via ABC News

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  1. Col_Reb_is_my_mascot

    It was more efficient when we used to stone them, but either way, it looks like we’ll have a good harvest this year.

    12 years ago at 6:59 pm
  2. guywhowearssperrys

    A cop slapped My Vagina once. Funny thing is I was wearing sperrys while he did it. I had just robbed an old ladys purse to fund my addiction to sudafed and viagra (killer boners man killer boners) and I was in an alley flipping through the contents. I found a dildo (that was completely dry despite what appeared to be years of wear and tear) a bunch of cash, an ID, and a copy of readers digest. So I’m like “sick readers digest my favorite. I’ve been wondering how to bake strawberry shortcake in four easy steps” when all of a sudden I notice a cop is running after me. So I sic my trusty chihahua who’s name was “My Vagina.” And what do you know the dickhead cop slaps him. This made my chihahua mad and he bit off the cops wiener. I threw the dildo at the cop as a consolation present and I ran off to play with My Vagina.

    12 years ago at 7:03 pm