The AP College Football Top 25 Re-Ranked By Tinder Performance
8 years ago

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If you didn’t care for the Cal-Hawaii game last Friday, then you’ll be excited to know that real college football kicks off tonight on ESPN. It’s back. For real this time. No more teasers.

The good people at Tinder (whose app, as you know, we are huge fans of) are trying to capitalize on all the college football excitement by re-ranking the AP Top 25 by Tinder performance. How does one school “perform” better than another on Tinder? That’s anyone’s guess, really. What I do know is that the ranking will probably not come as a shock to most of you.

Here it is, in its entirety.

25. LSU
24. TCU
23. Ole Miss
22. Notre Dame
21. Oklahoma
20. Baylor
19. Louisville
18. Stanford
17. Oklahoma State
16. Tennessee
15. Clemson
14. Houston
13. Iowa
12. Oregon
11. Georgia
10. North Carolina
9. Alabama
8. Washington
7. USC
6. Michigan
5. UCLA
4. Florida
3. Michigan State
2. Ohio State
1. Florida State

Florida State at No. 1? Color me shocked. Of course, this ranking excludes all the schools with bad or no football teams and incredible Tinder games (looking at you, Miami (OH), Texas State and UNCW).

Also, probably would have been a good idea to exclude Baylor from the list. I’m not sure the Tinder PR people are actually college football fans.

Steve Holt Has Got You Covered

Current record: 1-0-1

OK. Time for the good stuff: The weekend locks. Last week on the Cal-Hawaii game, I pushed the spread and won the over. Gives me a total record of 1-0-1. Undefeated, baby.

Here are my five weekend picks. Remember, anybody who tries to give you gambling advice using analytics or some stupid shit like that is a moron. Gambling is all about your gut. What does your gut want you to do? That little piece of wisdom could make you a very rich man.

Thursday

South Carolina v. Vanderbilt — Under 41
Appalachian State v. Tennessee — App State + 21

Friday

Kansas State v. Stanford — Under 48

Saturday

UNC v. UGA — Over 56.5

Sunday

Texas v. Notre Dame — Texas +13.5

Lock ’em up, y’all.

Image via Tumbler/USC Delta Gamma

  2. StoryTeller

    Steve, you and Kapernick should gouge each other’s eyes out then go play in traffic

    8 years ago at 3:22 pm
    1. The Sixth Year

      Steve is a piece of shit garbage human, but in his defense, forcing a pick is how you slowly dwindle your bankroll in sports betting. If you don’t got a lean or a play, don’t force it for the sake of having one. That is, if you want to make money. If you’re a degenerate gambler like me, force it.

      8 years ago at 3:52 pm
  7. Not Tim Riggins

    I never would have imagined Michigan State near the top of all these lists.

    8 years ago at 5:47 pm