Brendan Dassey’s Brother Drops Hilariously Bad Rap Song Defending ‘Making A Murderer’ Duo
It took me six hours to write the headline for this story. There was just so much information that needed to be packed in for it to even make sense. You know what I’m saying, Campbell?
Anyway, Brad Dassey, half brother to Brendan Dassey of Netflix’s smash hit documentary “Making a Murderer,” is apparently a Christian rapper, and Brad just dropped a track called “They Didn’t Do It” in defense of Brendan Dassey and Steven Avery.
You can’t make this stuff up.
Before listening, keep in mind that Brad Dassey’s SoundCloud account explicitly states: “Here’s a track I wrote, spent 10 hours straight on about Brendan Dassey and Steven Avery.”
We’re talking about 10 hours of effort here. He put in work on this track and came as hard as he possibly could. Brad was going to fucking kill this beat no matter how long that shit took. He knew this song had to be straight fire in order to spread awareness of his brother’s innocence and wrongful conviction.
Alright, so that wasn’t great. It lands somewhere between Riff Raff and present day Lil Wayne in terms of lyrics.
“They didn’t do it, they didn’t do it. Come to your senses everything is just foolish. Things clearly showed that it was just a joke. Cops were only there just to prod and poke. Not a fair trial, not a fair game. Whole thing’s wack, just a lyin’ shame. Innocent girl, just gone missin’, puzzle is broken, people upset, just a bad bet.”
I would say there’s no way that Brad actually spent 10 hours on this as he claims, but then I remember that he’s related to Brendan Dassey, possibly the most feeble-minded human being currently drawing breath.
I don’t know what brand of meth convinced Brad that making this song was a good idea, or whether or not Brendan and Steven are guilty (they probably are), but I do know I’m never going anywhere fucking near Manitowoc County. Lock boom bam. GONE!.
Brad IQ must not be that much higher than his brother’s IQ. Probably would vote for me.
10 years ago at 9:58 pmThey’re probably Sanders supporters. You are too highbrow for them
10 years ago at 10:20 pmHe sounds like a real Braddass. (I’d like to thank his poorly thought out soundcloud account name for writing that joke for me.)
10 years ago at 10:55 pmYeah
10 years ago at 11:13 pmI mean, even if they didn’t do it, they look like the type of fucks that should be in jail anyways.
10 years ago at 11:30 pmGreat stuff man
10 years ago at 7:50 amScared the heck out of my cat.
10 years ago at 4:50 amI imagine that Brad was wearing the same exact pair of zip-off cargo shorts while recording that Brendan was wearing in his illegal interrogation.
10 years ago at 6:51 amA lot better than Clampzzzzzaignss defense looked against bama, the only real team they played (and obviously got murdered by) all season
10 years ago at 6:56 amNobody gives a fuck about what you have to say
10 years ago at 10:59 amI just imagine a white guy with curly hair and multi colored parachute pants jumping around a ghetto NY neighborhood in the mid 80’s.
10 years ago at 8:33 amKid sitting on the couch looks like 99% of tuco’s frat bros. especially after they got neutered on primetime lna
10 years ago at 9:58 amManitowoc is really making the rest of my state look as bad as it really is.
10 years ago at 1:30 pm