Canadians Toss Dwarfs At Strip Clubs, Which Sounds Awesome
“You guys ready for some tossing?” the announcer asks, as Mötley Crüe blares over the sound system and audience members start to chant, ‘Dwarf! Dwarf! Dwarf!’ while pounding their hands on the tables.”
Believe it or not, this is not a scene out of the Wolf of Wall Street; this is the raucous environment of the Leopard’s Lounge Strip club in Windsor, Ontario on a Saturday night, where they actually host dwarf tosses.
To Mike Murga however, a celebrity-like figure in the dwarf tossing world, this is much more than just a drunkenly infused, testosterone pumping thrill ride. This is a sport. On an average night, Mike is tossed anywhere between 50 and 60 times, from a distance of around 10 feet, which I am guessing is regulation distance for dwarf tossing. Apparently, the tossing of dwarfs is not as easy as one may think, as one man announces fresh off a recent heave, “He’s three feet tall, but fuck he’s dense.” While dense Mike and the rowdy Saturday night crowd at the Leopard’s Lounge may enjoy the show, other community members in Windsor are not so fond of the notion.
From Vice:
Dwarf-tossing has a history of complaint and outrage in Windsor, the activity angering a local MPP enough to try to get a law passed banning the spectacle. Windsor West MPP Sandra Pupatello put forward a private member’s bill in 2003, but it failed to pass to its second reading.
”
Leave it to the Canadians to have a law regarding the tossing of dwarfs actually fail to pass. The outrage, however, does not impact Mike’s razor sharp focus when it comes to performing under pressure. As he says, “When I’m up there, I am in the zone.” Frankly, I am not sure what kind of grown man would wait in line to throw a dwarf across a stage, but hey, if the little guy loves it, who are we to judge?.
[via Vice]
Image via Google Maps
Canada, you finally did something right.
10 years ago at 10:18 amC-A-N-A-D-A
10 years ago at 10:19 amMidgets freak me out. I would never want to get close enough to one to touch it.
10 years ago at 10:21 amyou shouldn’t. they carry AIDS
10 years ago at 10:26 amWhere is PC Principal when you need him.
10 years ago at 10:45 amyou’re the kid that didn’t get let in to the party
10 years ago at 5:23 pmI still believe in my original statement. midgets have AIDS but you’re welcome to find out for yourselves
10 years ago at 5:23 pmYou have done 4 things right in the history of your country, Canada. Hockey, Poutine, midget throwing, and the history of settling drunk disagreements with physical altercations. Don’t ruin a good thing
10 years ago at 10:26 amAnd fully nude titty bars. Should call them Beaver Bars because Canada and everything.
10 years ago at 12:15 pmPlus everyone can legally drink here by the time they’re 19; some by 18. Lacrosse, basketball, and the push-up bra ain’t too bad either.
10 years ago at 7:14 amDwarves*.
10 years ago at 11:15 amAs a UWindsor student, I can assure you that this is about as exciting as it gets here.
10 years ago at 11:37 amNot to start a pissing contest or anything, but you guys aren’t exactly in a position to comment on an inability to pass laws.
10 years ago at 11:39 amSorry, eh.
10 years ago at 11:50 am
via giphy.com
10 years ago at 11:55 amThe little guys are heavier than they look
10 years ago at 12:51 pmAs someone who enjoyed numerous trips to Windsor in my college days, primarily for the sports book at Caesar’s Windsor during March Madness, I can personally vouch for Leopard’s.
It’s the common man’s equivalent of Cheetah’s, the other major jiggle joint on the main drag in Windsor. Two other offerings at Leopard’s:
(1) Due to the fact that Canadians are savages who use coins instead of paper money for single dollar denominations, it’s much more difficult to ball on a budget, because the girls are generally unreceptive to making it thunderstorm. However, they will allow you to lay back on the stage, with a “Looney” in your mouth, at which point they will dance over you and pick up said coin without the benefit of hands or feet.
(2) Leopard’s also offers a mean lunch special. It’s free provided you buy a drink, and consists of a foot-long kielbasa which is tastefully, and suggestively, surrounded at one end by a perfectly circular scoop of cole slaw and potato salad nestled delicately up against said sausage.
All in all, while Canada I’d certainly NF, Leopard’s is a nice little oasis in an otherwise barren hellscape.
10 years ago at 3:14 pm