Cornell’s Admissions Directors Held A Reddit AMA And It Went Exactly As Expected

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Shawn Felton, Director of Undergraduate Admissions, and Tara Bubble, Sr., Associate Director of Undergraduate Admissions at Cornell University, thought it’d be a brilliant idea to hop on Reddit (first mistake) and hold an “Ask Me Anything” with the world wide web (second mistake). They were hoping to shed some light on the admissions process for prospectives and how to build a better application.

Let’s go to the tape and see how it goes.

Hi Cornell Admissions. I’m a prospective student and I’m really excited by your Hotel Management major. What am I supposed to do when I can’t find a job?

Cornell Admissions:The School of Hotel Administration (SHA) has an excellent Career Services Office. There are a wide range of opportunities in business now that the major is AACSB accredited.

I think the person was really asking what are they to do when they enter the real world where jobs are scarce. A better answer would have been something like “shake as many hands as you can. Build that network. And pray to the Gods that someone out there who is experienced isn’t going for the same job you want as an entry-level associate.” That’s just the reality of the job market. This is just one of the examples of the questions that were actually being answered.

In total, the admissions team answered barely any of the questions that were asked of them except for the ones that they could give generic answers to that anyone with a computer and internet connection could search. So I won’t include the rest of those here. Hence why if you’re going to go and do an AMA, you answer all the hard-hitting questions.

Here are some of the ones I wanted them to answer:

How do you show your face in public when you charge $65k a year to 18 year olds?

How many of those hockey players actually have the grades to get in to Cornell?

In general, are ivy leaguers whiny little cunts before they attend university, or do you guys make them that way?

It got so bad that eventually the two just stopped responding altogether. Apparently, they don’t know that a bunch of pissed off students who are extremely tired from pulling all-nighters to cram for finals can create a hostile environment for university officials.

If Cornell was actually smart about this whole thing, they should have had their biggest celeb run the AMA: Andy Bernard. Everyone knows that ‘Nard dog is the King of Cornell. Sure, he might have only gotten in because his dad donated a building. But as Andy will remind you, he got in because he is smart enough to have a dad that can donate a building.

The only pitch Cornell ever needs:

In a matter of 22 hours, they have only answered 25 questions. Bang up job, Cornell. Bang up job.

[via Reddit]

Image via YouTube

  1. Late80s_dad_dick

    Cornell is in the Kevin MaCalister of the Ivy League, people only remember it when they try to list them all.

    10 years ago at 10:27 am
    1. Oral Hershiser

      This is a great joke (which I will be stealing), but Dartmouth is the real Kevin McAlister of the Ivy League.

      10 years ago at 11:24 am
      1. Oral Hershiser

        Haha, holy shit, just saw all the other Dartmouth jokes below. Didn’t mean to pile on, but not apologizing for doing so. (TFM)

        10 years ago at 11:26 am
      2. dubyas

        If Dartmouth is the Ivy League’s Kevin McCallister, Brown is the bumble-headed mom who doesn’t deserve to be there. And I guess MIT can be Joe Pesci screaming “LET ME IN!!!” with head on fire.

        10 years ago at 12:35 pm
  2. Peter Griffin

    If you have to tell people your school is Ivy League then the rest of the Ivy League probably doesn’t acknowledge you.

    10 years ago at 10:49 am
  3. CommonSenseUSA

    It could’ve been much worse. At least it wasn’t Dartmouth that decided to do an AMA.

    10 years ago at 10:51 am
  4. Nigel Fratters

    Fun “Office” Fact: The actress Mindy Kaling (Kelly) was a Dartmouth grad, and to poke fun at Cornell’s perceived obnoxious alumni, the writers designed Andy’s character as a personification of this perception.

    10 years ago at 10:57 am
    1. The_Names_Doug_Dimmadome

      Just to highlight another stupid decision Cornell has made: Ed helms gave the commencement speech at my graduation two years ago. Cornell actually hired someone who has made a career by acting as one of our pretentious, obnoxious alumni to speak to the newest batch of pretentious, obnoxious alumni.

      10 years ago at 1:37 pm
  5. Rich_one_percenter_GEED

    As a Cornell alumn (my freshmen dorm was on the left and behind the building on the picture, it was back in the days when freshmen lived on West Campus), I admit that the number of times when the name of my alma mater helped further my career is ZERO.

    IMO the only Ivy league school worth paying so much money are Harvard, Yale, MIT, and maybe Princeton. And that’s ONLYif you DON’T plan to go on to medical/law or other postgraduate school (I did). In general, the longer your education, the less the ‘prestige’ of your institution matters.

    10 years ago at 1:54 pm
    1. Rich_one_percenter_GEED

      I forgot to mention Wharton School of Business–it is definitely worth the $$$.

      10 years ago at 1:57 pm
    2. Bill Werrell

      You forgot about Penn, who’s business school is consistently in the running for best in the world and who’s alumni base is about half of Wall Street.

      10 years ago at 3:04 pm
    3. Tyrion Frattister

      Cornell’s West Campus hasn’t had freshmen live in it since 2001 when they were all required to live on North Campus. So you’re 32+ years old and on TFM, guess your job that required a postgraduate degree offers you a lot of free time. And as a self proclaimed geed, how did you not get into a Greek organization at Cornell when roughly a third of the population is a part of Greek life? It again begs the question why you’re here in the first place, and if you’re actually a Cornell alumnus.

      You forgot to consider that postgraduate school applicants from Ivy League schools are often viewed more favorably than those who didn’t attend one, so you can’t necessarily say that Cornell did not help further your career since it probably helped you get into grad school.

      Just an aside: Cornell’s Dyson school is also a top ranked business school and has a ton of alumni on Wall Street.

      10 years ago at 4:19 pm