“Craft” Vodka Is The Newest Trend To Hit The Liquor Market

To put it bluntly, I hate hipsters. They’re an abomination of the millennial generation and are the reason everyone assumes we’re pretentious assholes. Buying local is a great thing. You can support your local economy and get some kick ass beer/food/etc you won’t find anywhere else. But buy the product because you enjoy it. Buying local for the sake of being different makes you the most annoying consumer known to man.
With a global rise in whiskey consumption, the vodka market has pretty much flattened out in comparison. When you break it down though, smaller “craft” distilleries are growing much more than big names like Absolut and Smirnoff. Companies looking to grow seek out the most effective marketing strategies, and with more millennials turning the ripe-old age of 21, the hottest marketing trend is to be local, unique, and craftsman-like. Case in point: Tito’s Vodka.
From Slate:
New Amsterdam doesn’t sell itself as particularly artisanal. But Tito’s does, with a label proudly proclaiming that it is “crafted in an old-fashioned pot-still by America’s original microdistillery.”
The wording has given them a bit of a headache with lawsuits that came about when customers discovered it was more a testament to the history of the drink instead of how it’s made today. Much like when a man sued MillerCoors for labeling Blue Moon beer as “artfully crafted,” I can’t help but bury my face into my palm over the blind stupidity of the consumer.
What’s especially frustrating in the case of Tito’s is that people actually expected a “craft” vodka. Craft beer is defined as being made by a small brewer with their own unique styles and recipes. Unlike beer which can be made with many different variations, spirits are all generally subjected to the same process. The only distinction between two vodkas is whether they have had flavor added to them. You’re kidding yourself if you think you’re going to be getting anything unique or distinguishable when you buy “craft” vodka. Don’t be a pretentious prick. Just buy the cheap big name stuff, it’s all the same, and it won’t matter when you puke it back up anyway..
[via Slate]
Image via YouTube
Tito’s is good shit, but you’re really fucking stupid if you think this is a new trend.
10 years ago at 4:10 pmYou’re right God’s gift has been around for a while
10 years ago at 4:11 pmThe owner has the best name possible: Tito Beveridge
10 years ago at 4:13 pmIt’s just a solution of alcohol and water. How “craft” can vodka really be?
10 years ago at 4:17 pmDo you have any idea what vodka is?
10 years ago at 4:58 pmNo dumbass do you know anything about vodka? Fucking google it. The first two goddamn sentences about it on Wikipedia are its of ethanol and water.
10 years ago at 8:52 amTry less
10 years ago at 9:50 amI dont know why you’re getting downvoted. As long as you have pure alcohol and pure water, you have vodka. Its pretty simple
10 years ago at 9:32 pmAnything but Taaka
10 years ago at 4:18 pmThe man behind Popov should be shot as well
10 years ago at 5:58 pmAnd Crystal Palace.
10 years ago at 9:06 pmAnd Barton’s.
10 years ago at 7:12 pmAristocrat
10 years ago at 10:53 amI thought you were just supposed to find an empty grey goose bottle and fill it with popov since all vodka taste like nail polish remover anyway
10 years ago at 5:29 pmQuick shoutout to Barton’s for getting me through failed exams.
10 years ago at 6:17 pmWas this a tsm article?
10 years ago at 6:21 pmNope
10 years ago at 7:15 amVodka is the easiest and least distinguishable alcohol to make. That’s why every C list celebrity has one
10 years ago at 10:05 pmIn my opinion, there’s not THAT big a difference between skol and top shelf vodka. Don’t get me wrong, there is a difference, but not $40 worth
10 years ago at 10:53 pmShow us your tits!
10 years ago at 9:24 amWe’re preparing a batch of “craft” jungle juice in our finest aged oak barrel trashcan. Stop on by.
10 years ago at 6:15 pm