Cuba Has A Shortage Of Beer Because American Tourists Are Drinking All Of It

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Since the United States eased travel restrictions with Cuba earlier this year, hundreds of thousands of Americans have flocked to the new tourist destination to drink Cristal after Cristal until their fanny packs were bursting at the seams.

We’ve thrown back so many Cuban brews that the nation’s entire industry is nearly tapped.

From The Guardian:

The ubiquitous fridges that dispense beer in Cuba’s bars, cafes and petrol stations are running out of the island’s favourite Cristal and Bucanero brands as a surge in American tourists and the proliferation of new private watering holes put the nation’s main brewery under strain.

Brewer Bucanero needs a new plant to keep pace with demand from tourists and a burgeoning private restaurant sector that competes with state-run outlets for supplies, Mayle Gonzalez, a sales executive at the company, said on Saturday..

Cuba received a record 3.5 million visitors last year, up 17% from 2014. American visitors rose 77% to 161,000, in addition to hundreds of thousands of Cuban-Americans, testing the country’s supply of hotel room, rental cars and beer.

But here’s the best part of all this: Through our alcoholism, we are taking a watery, Star Spangled beer shit all over communism. Let me explain.

Cuba is still communist as fuck, meaning the government only gives state-run bars a certain amount of beer to sell. This has led to many establishments opening up private bars upstairs or in basements, where they sell beer shipped in from abroad with zero interference from their fascist leaders.

“Private bars can go out and find supplies where they can, I can only sell what the government gives me,” said the manager of a state-run bar that ran out of beer, while a private bar upstairs had a fridge full of cold bottles.

Defeating communism by getting piss drunk off an ice cold case of quality imports? That’s an idea I can get behind.

[via The Guardian]

Image via YouTube

    1. Jackpittman

      I tried to think of a funny reply to this comment but I couldn’t. Sorry for letting down my incredible fan base. You guys are what motivate me to get up in the morning and make hilarious comments. Life’s tough out here for a middle school frat star such as I, and sometime the pressures just get to me. Again, I would like to apologize for my lack of hilarity on this occasion.

      8 years ago at 1:36 pm
      1. Keep It Buttery

        Sweet baseless assumption, you fuckin’ nerd. Take your laps and go.

        8 years ago at 2:05 pm
  1. ImHereForTheGangbang

    “Hey, what happened to all of our beer?”

    “You’ve had a huge influx of beer demand from all the new American tourists coming to visit and your supply isn’t keeping pace.”

    “Su-ply? De-mand? I’m confused.”

    “Let me tell you about a man named Adam Smith……”

    8 years ago at 12:12 pm
    1. Keep It Buttery

      Well that was quite possibly the least entertaining hypothetical conversation I’ve ever seen.

      8 years ago at 12:14 pm
      1. Tsunami The PiKapp

        Your user name makes me think of the sock puppet Dorn uses to entertain children.

        8 years ago at 12:56 pm
    2. Corn1845

      Hell, bring me along with you. I’ll gladly take laps with anyone who actually knows who Adam Smith is.

      8 years ago at 12:20 pm
  2. Gentleman in Bauers

    I actually just Came back from Cuba a couple of weeks ago. It probably doesn’t help them that a can of Bucanero costs less than a dollar a can even at the airport and tastes almost as good as yuengling. I brought back a 24 pack for 20 bucks

    8 years ago at 12:31 pm
    1. Dan Regester-edsexoffender

      This comment is a small step up from the comments offering 100k a year jobs that can be done from home.

      8 years ago at 12:45 pm
      1. 1_Rugey_Jentelman

        I think he lost that small step. At least the others put in enough effort for a small story; and they yield some excellent replies.

        8 years ago at 1:18 pm
      2. Dan Regester-edsexoffender

        Guess it was too expensive to outbid roudy gentleman and counterstrike for some add space

        8 years ago at 7:45 pm
    1. Gentleman in Bauers

      When the handles of rum cost 6 bucks each and US customs not even checking my baggage when I got back here to see how much I brought back, I am sure those figures are quite similar.

      8 years ago at 12:55 pm
  3. Tsunami The PiKapp

    Drinking and pissing a 0.20 BAC-stream of piss all over communism. TFM.

    8 years ago at 12:55 pm