Devoutly Religious Congressional Candidate Posts Screenshot Online, Forgets To Close Multiple Porn Tabs

Alex Buscemi9 years ago

Mike Webb, the Republican candidate for Congress in Virginia’s 8th district, posted a screenshot of a Yahoo search to his Facebook page. Problem is, the devoutly religious congressional hopeful forgot to close not one, but two tabs of hardcore pornography.

Whoops.

One tab reads, “LAYLA RIVERA TIGHT BODY,” the other, “IVONE SEXY AMATEUR.”

For the sake of journalism, I double-checked the videos to see if they are indeed pornographic. They are. I can also confirm with full certainty that Layla’s body is indeed “TIGHT,” and Ivone is indeed “SEXY” — though I’m not totally convinced she’s an amateur.

I respect Webb’s split-screen viewing habits. Switching between videos with one hand while going to town on yourself with the other is a definite play. A man who can multi-task like that is fit for office in my book. I do question his decision-making abilities, however. His choice in porn is prime, but the dude uses Yahoo to search stuff. Makes no sense.

Webb defended himself by saying that he was merely checking to see if the pornographic websites contained malicious viruses that could prove harmful to his campaign. Seriously.

From Esquire:

He said: “Curious by nature, I wanted to test the suggestion that somehow, lurking out in the pornographic world, there is some evil operator waiting for the one in a gazillion chance that a candidate for federal office would go to that particular website and thereby be infected with a virus that would cause his or her FEC data file to crash the FECfile application each time that it was loaded on the day of the filing deadline, as well as impact other critical campaign systems.”

Perfect excuse for anyone whose girlfriend or wife or mom walks in on them watching porn.

“Nothing’s going on, sweetie. I’m just checking for viruses is all.”

“With your dick out!?”

“Yeah… uhh… I’m checking that for viruses, too.”

Webb eventually (sort of) admitted to pleasuring himself to the Devil’s YouTube before profusely referencing his service to the Lord. Nice save..

[via Esquire]

Image via Shutterstock