Everyone In Rio Gets Free Pornhub Premium During The Olympics, I Have To Go Now

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The talk of the world has been pretty repetitive these past few weeks. Olympics this, Rio that, and let’s not forget Zika. Athletes have been dropping out of the games like flies, and I don’t blame them one bit. From turmoil in Rio to turds in Rio, there’s no shortage of reasons to avoid these games. The most prevalent reason, though, is that athletes want to avoid exposure to the Zika virus.

Zika, as far as we know, is only spread by two methods: being bitten by an infected mosquito and doing the dirty with an infected person. Efforts have already been made to try and prevent the disease from spreading as easily as most Olympic athletes’ legs their first night in the village. Notably, the number of condoms being supplied to the Olympic Village is over three times as many as they had in London four years ago. But condoms break and don’t always work, so when you’re spending a couple of weeks in a region classified as “Alert Level 2” by the CDC, it’s best to err on the side of caution. Enter, Pornhub.

From Cosmopolitan:

Much like sports, if you can’t do it yourself, you can at least get pleasure watching other people, and Pornhub is here to help you do just that. Introducing the “Ooohlympics,” a campaign exclusive to Rio de Janeiro for the 2016 Olympic games.

Through Aug. 21, Rio residents, athletes, and visitors can get a free membership to Pornhub Premium, normally $9.99, streaming all the sex they can’t be having in glorious HD.

Finally, someone is coming up with real solutions. I don’t blame the athletes for wanting to get it on while abroad, because their peers are some of the hottest pieces of ass to walk the planet. But, they could just as easily pull slams back home after competing, so why risk getting infected with a disease that we still don’t know that much about? There’s so much to explore with that free premium account, you could easily get through two weeks without sex in real life. Plus, Pornhub will also be on site handing out bug spray, tissues and lube to combat Zika, so there’s really no excuse for coming home infected and being the reason this disease spreads around the world even faster.

[via Cosmopolitan]

Image via Shutterstock

  1. Bush Light

    I mean I get sex is super frat and stuff, but the Olympics becoming (or being) a big dirty fuckfest is pretty trashy and classless.

    9 years ago at 2:47 pm
  2. InHoc04

    Aren’t we supposed to get Exec Board or some other shitty video today? Hope the late/non-existent Fail Friday trend isn’t spreading to other content.

    9 years ago at 2:49 pm
    1. Brother Gumby

      Soon there will be no content on TFM, just a neverending comment section.

      9 years ago at 5:41 pm