Everything You Missed While Drinking Your Ass Off At Tailgate: College Football Week 6 Recap

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You just put in a 14-hour day crushing countless Game Day Lights on an empty stomach, asserted dominance over any fool that went even remotely close to the ladderball setup, and shamelessly finger blasted your pledge brother’s 18-year-old sister under the sign-in table. Needless to say, you had your hands full, so you undoubtedly missed what went down throughout the rest of the country. But no worries, guys. That’s what I’m here for: To spend Saturdays watching college football. Your thanks is not necessary, as I’m not in this line of work for the praise. I make the sacrifice of planting my ass firmly on the couch so people like you don’t have to — so you can go out and live the tailgate life the way tailgate life was meant to be lived. At the very least, hopefully this makes that crippling hangover today more bearable.

Week 6

Finebaum steals the damn show before it even gets started

Always leave them wanting more, Paul.

The greatest rivalry in sports had me jazzed up

Holman’s back. Fuck UConn! We’re turning this season around.

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Just fill the next bong with bleach and put me out of my misery.

Charlie Strong lives out the greatest day of his life.

I was legitimately starting to feel bad for the Longhorns and Charlie Strong. Then, one of our interns told me Texas doesn’t have homecoming because “We’re better than that.” I now hope all the bad things happen to you and only you, Texas.

Holy index finger. Charlie, what do you feed that thing?

Jim Harbaugh goes insane while his team is up 31 points.

Never change, Jim.

Baylor covered the 45 point spread

Easiest money of the day.

Fournette just seems like an all around good dude.

Georgia hands Florida the SEC East, Chubb is done for the year, and Rocky Top found its newest middle linebacker in the unlikeliest of places.

Hitstick!

The Nick Chubb video is at the very bottom. Just do yourself a favor and skip over it.

Dabo Swinney takes over for the weekly Baker Mayfield dance clip.

There’s trouble brewing in the kicker community.

TCU does it again.

Swapping numbers mid game. #TFM

A video posted by Total Frat Move (@totalfratmove) on

Get used to Utah. They aren’t going anywhere.

Around the rest of the country
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DO NOT WATCH NICK CHUBB DESTROYING HIS KNEE BELOW.
Don’t watch it.
Seriously don’t.
Just go to the comments.
You don’t want to see it.
Alright.
Fine.
Here you go, you sick fuck.


I told you.
But you didn’t listen.
That’s on you.

  1. Rocky Fratboa

    No mention of Rafael Gaglianone? Fat kickers drilling game winners, it’s a TFM.

    10 years ago at 11:06 am
  2. Kav

    I may be a UF fan, but I never want to see a player get injured, even from our rival university. I’m sending prayers out to Chubb, and I hope he has a safe and speedy recovery.

    10 years ago at 11:08 am
  3. Mrballoonhands

    Fournette might not be the most articulate player on the field, but he definitely has the biggest heart and plays his ass off after every single snap. Not to mention he raises his daughter during the week while going to class, and still puts up outrageous numbers on Saturdays. Have to give credit where credit is due and that kid deserves every bit and more.

    10 years ago at 11:48 am
    1. P.G.T Beauregard

      Not even that he isn’t the most articulate, he is fluent in creole which a mix of French and English and it’s common in Louisiana. That’s where the accent comes from.

      10 years ago at 2:48 pm
  4. Bluto_Brotarsky

    I’d like to say that winning a game on a field goal perfectly sums up Wake’s team.

    10 years ago at 11:58 am
  5. CaptainTaintSniff

    The Wake Forest – BC game was the worst game of offensive football I’ve ever watched. Both teams should be awarded losses and be sent down to the FCS.

    10 years ago at 12:08 pm