Green Party Candidate Jill Stein Has Been Tweeting Some Weird Shit

jill stein

You may recognize Jill Stein as the Green Party candidate that’s recently been reported to be trailing her contemporaries Deez Nuts and Harambe in the polls. With election day now on the horizon, you’d expect to see each and every candidate bring their A-game and putting their best foot forward. Although I haven’t been following Dr. Jill Stein very closely on the campaign trail, I’m becoming more and more interested in what she’s up to. And if her Twitter feed is any indication, she’s becoming one of the more interesting candidates in the field. Let’s check up on her:

Jesus Christ. Glad to see that the more obscure candidates are just as bad as the frontrunners when it comes to pandering to millennials. Everyone knows that Thomas Jefferson had the dankest memes.

Taking cheap shots at my boy Anthony W? He MADE A MISTAKE! Repeatedly. He made a lot of mistakes. What Stein doesn’t understand is that when God gifts you with a healthy member, it’s bound to get into some weird places. Just a fact of life.

Wow, she seems more fixated on Harambe than we are.

Uh, maybe they understand that Harambe is our best chance to end racism and violence? Delete your account, Jill. Twitter doesn’t want or need the likes of you.

Her next move is to insult the man responsible for the series of tubes that send her tweets to everyone’s computers. That’s a bold strategy, Cotton.

Yeah, down with the man! While the corrupt Clintons ran this country in the mid-’90s, Jill Stein was blasting Rage Against The Machine in a smoke-filled van.

Wait a second, you did realize that RT is pretty much English-language Russian propaganda before you retweeted that, right? No? Alright, carry on.

A possible running mate?

Look Jill, I know you’re exhausted. The campaign trail is tough, but you have to be able to compete with Naked Trump if you want to have any chance at… snagging a single-digit percentage of the vote.

Okay, looking at all these has made me sad. No matter what you think of Jill Stein, remember that she’s been verified for a hell of a lot longer than @DCheverere.

Image via YouTube

  1. GodHatesFigs

    I hope that hippie steals all of Bernie’s supporters from Hill-Dawg and splits the liberal vote. That’s the only way this socialist crazy cat lady could help this country

    8 years ago at 2:05 pm
  2. FlannelsAndHandles1856

    Maybe she should start using crystals to heal her poll numbers

    8 years ago at 3:51 pm
  3. BetaThetaBye

    I hope you realize no one has beat this Harambe thing down more than you TFM, not even Jill.

    8 years ago at 8:05 pm