ufc 214 bruce buffer cormier jones

Your One-Stop Guide To Betting On Saturday’s UFC 214

ufc 214 bruce buffer cormier jones

I’ll be damned if MelKiperSr lets the biggest card of the year go unnoticed.

Donald “Cowboy” Cerrone (+130) vs. Robbie Lawler (-160)

This is the fight that everyone is prematurely calling the “Fight of the Year.” Both guys are exciting and are coming off their largest layoffs in a while. However, Lawler is still the best welterweight in the world in my eyes, and Cowboy is a natural lightweight. So for this one, I’m going with Robbie Lawler.

Jimi Manuwa (-185) vs Volkan Oezdemir (+150)

This is probably the toughest fight for me to pick given my extreme hatred for Manuwa and the fact that the Ooze has only had two fights in the UFC. It’s hard to gauge if Lil Oezi Vert is actually good or not, since in his two fights he won a split decision against Ovince Saint Preux, who is pretty streaky, and knocked out Misha Cirkunov while backing away from a flurry. With Jimi, on the other hand, we know what we are getting: a guy who racks up highlight reel knockouts against shit competition. His only two losses were his only two fights against the top five. Those fights weren’t close, either. Since this one is essentially a toss-up, I’m taking the underdog. Volkan Oezdemir is the pick.

Cris Cyborg (-1200) vs Tonya Evinger (+700)

Cyborg is considered by many to be the best female fighter ever, which is impressive for someone who has never fought anyone who’s actually good. Cyborg isn’t the most technical striker, and it’ll catch up to her eventually. With odds like this, I will take Evinger any day. Side note: Evinger is indirectly responsible for the greatest line of color commentary in sports history.

Tyron Woodley (-210) vs Demian Maia (+170)

Tyron said before this fight that every time he’s been co-main event to a bigger fight, he’s stolen the show. This is true, though he’s only co-mained once. Stylistically, this probably won’t be very exciting. Expect four rounds of Tyron backing away not throwing any offense until Maia eventually drags him down and submits him in the fifth.

Jon “Bones” Jones (-270) vs Daniel Cormier (+210)

The biggest fight in UFC history is difficult to bet on, as there are a lot of things to consider. Was Jones on the juice earlier? Will he have ring rust? Why do him and DC keep talking about his dick? My gut says DC, and I enjoy picking underdogs so I’m sticking now with my gut.

Image via Shutterstock

  1. BIowjob420

    Based on your name, I assume you have a rather large penis. Me too! Mine is 4 inches when fully erect. That’s well above average, right? That’s what my mom told me.

    7 years ago at 10:03 am
    1. Blowjob420

      I’m waiting for you to make a troll account of my other profile. I wonder when you will figure it out.

      7 years ago at 10:59 am
  2. SharkWeekTFM

    Many people think sharks still use a phone but actually they don’t because they dissolve quickly in salt water and also sharks don’t use land lines.

    7 years ago at 10:31 am
  3. Magnum_Dong

    My original title was “Putting your money on the dong” but the edit was probably for the best.

    7 years ago at 11:13 am
    1. Magnum_Dong

      However I also learned that stating that someone is a lesbian when they are in fact lesbian, and making fun of Tyron Woodley’s race-baiting will also be edited out. I understand it but am still a little disappointed.

      7 years ago at 11:16 am
  4. Mitch The Godfather Martin

    Babe of the Day has those “I’ll give you road head but I might also bite it off” eyes.

    7 years ago at 11:21 am
  5. MelKiperSr

    Sorry for not writing this one up, guys.

    You got stuck with some below average bets and aggressively poor takes. DC/JJ is definitely not the biggest fight in UFC history, btw.

    Cowboy, Manuwa, Cyborg, Maia, Jones.

    7 years ago at 12:53 pm
      1. Magnum_Dong

        Also the Evinger pick was mainly so I could have an excuse to include that video

        7 years ago at 1:28 pm
    1. GoodbyeNormalStreet

      Agree on every pick except Cowboy and Maia. I think Lawler’s the better fighter. Cerrone looked bad against Matt Brown until he knocked him out. Masvidal outboxed him and I think Lawler will too.

      As a jiu jitsu practitioner I want to pick Maia but I just don’t see him doing well against Woodley who’s a superior athlete and moves better on his feet. Maia’s striking doesn’t look great but apparently he hits really hard so we’ll see. Hopefully he pulls it out, one of the last true martial artists in MMA

      7 years ago at 8:03 pm