High School Frat Prospects
Preston Boatright
Height: 6’2”
Weight: 220 lbs.
High School: Highland Park – Dallas, TX
GPA: 3.5
Strengths:
– more money than God
– family helicopter
– family suite at Dallas Cowboys games
– great mop of hair
– respectable beer belly for his age
– beer softball phenom
– a legend exists from his senior year that says he hooked up with two different teachers in the same week
– scratch golfer
– his mother is a solid 8.5 or 9
Weaknesses:
– STD positive, but treatable
Classmate Quote: “Oh shit, Preston? We’re all waiting to see which school he chooses. That’s where we’re going, too.”
Considering: SMU, Texas, Ole Miss, Georgia
Boatwright, FaF.
13 years ago at 11:48 amI mean his last name has “Boat” in it. Got to be FaF
13 years ago at 12:46 pmThat picture has to be photoshopped
13 years ago at 12:47 pmI think he’s hot!
13 years ago at 12:51 pm^^ It clearly states that these are fictional characters. On your lap, learn to read.
13 years ago at 1:09 pmPreston Boatwright is former KA at Miss. State from a couple years ago.
13 years ago at 2:58 pmBut what’s his chill to pull ratio?
13 years ago at 2:59 pmNot the same Preston Boatwright as the picture though.
13 years ago at 3:11 pmThe sheer fact Youngstown State got mentioned in this is a joke. They have the most pathetic greek system in existence. Literally a bunch of shit hole houses in the ghetto where they try to pass off “parties” and the sororities are filled with nothing but girls who often times weigh more than the men in fraternities.
Literally not joking at all
13 years ago at 3:54 pmand I definitely did not want to reply to this comment. Dammit.
13 years ago at 3:55 pmLacing up as we speak…
^^ You know the kid is a one star, right?
13 years ago at 4:23 pmId let Preston pee pee
13 years ago at 4:57 pm^After reading many of your comments in recent years, I have come to the conclusion that you are loosey goosey
13 years ago at 6:38 pmAnd you most likely have a urinary tract infection due to holding pee in for soo long. Get that shit checked out, bud.
13 years ago at 9:28 pmThats Cooper Smith. He plays baseball at Cornell. The picture with Bush is not photoshopped. I went to high school with him.
13 years ago at 7:51 pm^ Yeah I destroyed that dude’s mom McCoy style one time.
13 years ago at 10:12 pmBelievable that he was KA at State. Solid guys, i like them.
13 years ago at 1:22 am^^^^ after reading many of your comments, i think we should get married.
13 years ago at 9:50 amThe fuck is this
13 years ago at 11:55 am^
13 years ago at 11:56 amTFM put a hazing target on 10 highschool kids.
13 years ago at 12:00 pm^ You remind me of Forrest Gump without any of his redeeming qualities.
13 years ago at 12:14 pm^ always had a way of explaining things so I could understand them
13 years ago at 12:34 pm^by writing in crayon?
13 years ago at 12:39 pmBut seriously
13 years ago at 1:25 pmGoddamnit, I expect this bullshit from Fratdusky maybe, but I thought Dorn was better than this. #TeamBacon
13 years ago at 5:21 pm^ Fratdusky does Elementary School Shower Prospects.
13 years ago at 5:23 pmWhy?
13 years ago at 12:00 pmI thought these were humorous.
13 years ago at 12:02 pmIs this…real?
13 years ago at 12:03 pmTake a lap
13 years ago at 10:23 pmHahaha, not a bad column.
13 years ago at 12:05 pmGuy #1 was spot one, everyone at TX State, LSU and A&M is from Blow Mont
13 years ago at 3:03 pmPeckerstein. “Solid 2.0”
I laughed.
13 years ago at 3:33 pmhell yeah! blow mont is the only place to frat hard
13 years ago at 7:25 am[Like]
13 years ago at 12:09 pmI hope this doesnt become a thing here
13 years ago at 12:11 pmLace ’em
13 years ago at 2:40 pm^^ I don’t think tyler understands the gravity of what he has just done. This very well could become the new “first”
13 years ago at 5:25 pm^Don’t say that
13 years ago at 6:39 pmThis is fucking stupid.
13 years ago at 12:13 pmThis is the gayest thing I’ve ever read.
13 years ago at 12:15 pmjudging by your name I can already assure you this is not the “gayest thing” you ever read
13 years ago at 12:51 pm“Guy’s a complete dick.’
13 years ago at 12:18 pm^I feel you should take a lap for fucking up the quotation marks.
13 years ago at 1:05 pmAnd the quote.
13 years ago at 1:07 pmI thought it was a funny column and if you didn’t get the obvious comparison to Rivals, you’re a fucking idiot and don’t pay enough attention to college football or basketball.
13 years ago at 12:32 pmI have a Rivals account. This is fucking gay.
13 years ago at 12:36 pm^ doesn’t get it
13 years ago at 12:48 pm