How Fitting: There Was A Literal Dumpster Fire At Mizzou Today

The title says it all. There was a dumpster on fire not too long ago at America’s current inextinguishable dumpster fire: The University of Missouri.

I assume the fire has been extinguished by now, but you never know. If the firefighters that service Mizzou’s campus are as helpless as its bloc of PC students and professors, it could still be going strong. It looks like the Columbia FD is there, though, so we should be fine.

The only thing that could make this situation more perfect would be if it was discovered that the fire was started by a liberal student who burned a copy of the constitution and then chucked it into the dumpster, while a ring of human-shields with an established perimeter, there to protect him from the media, looked on.

      1. Larry_Sellers

        I’m honestly shocked this got upvotes. I was piss drunk when I wrote that.

        8 years ago at 12:01 am
  1. JackDanielsrunning

    What’s the over under on the number of snapchats of a flaming dumpster that read “it’s lit”?

    8 years ago at 5:21 pm