Ivy League Students Are Failing Out Of School In Order To Spend More Time Protesting

Ivy League Students are Failing Out of School In Order To Spend More Time Protesting

The pressures of going to an Ivy League school appear to have reached an all-time high; no, not because of the rigorous workload or the intensely competitive atmosphere, but because of the “activist responsibilities” that these students so honorably shoulder the burden of undertaking. The hysteria of this situation was captured in an article published in The Brown Daily Herald.

“There are people breaking down, dropping out of classes and failing classes because of the activism work they are taking on. My grades have dropped dramatically. My health completely changed. I lost weight. I’m on anti-depressants and anxiety pills right now. I had deans calling me to make sure I was okay” expressed one traumatized student.

Nothing like having your priorities in order, am I right? I am sure that each and every one of these students will be so proud to tell the story of how they chose to fail out of an Ivy League school so they could spend more time focusing on their activist duties. I hear that employers also love to see that on a resume. “I may be an Ivy League dropout, but I helped to diversify the fuck out of that school.” Human rights are fantastic, no doubt about it, but there comes a point in the process where a protester crosses over from being an activist to just merely being an unnecessary nuisance to the issue.

This somewhat laughable scenario is not merely the fault of the students, however. One student profiled in the article named Justice Gaines provides insight into how the university itself is helping to foster this atmosphere of hyper-activism. Gaines mentions that he actually receives notes from the deans that excuse him from class so that he is able to organize and attend these activist movements. Congratulations, Mr. and Miss. Gaines. Your $70,000 of annual tuition is going towards making picket signs and excused absence notes — really getting a great return on investment here. Worth noting: Gaines also uses the “gender-neutral pronouns,” xe, xem xyr, so if that doesn’t tell you all that you need to know about this dude I’m not sure what will.

It is evident that these kids will not stop until every last individual is freed from all of their micro-aggressions, stressors, and triggers, even if it is at the expense of their college and employment careers. So Brown, how about we step up and stop handing out these excused absence notes and get the kids back in classrooms. And to the students, if you are unable to function due to the hardships of others, maybe your parents’ basement is a better destination for you as opposed to a college campus.

[via The Brown Daily Herald]

Image via YouTube

  1. thaisticktony

    Makes sense. Throw away that probably heavily financially aided scholarship cause the school doesn’t do enough for you.

    8 years ago at 1:05 pm
  2. fratsohardUn1versity

    The biggest thing ive noticed about these SJW is the effect on their lives. They walk around campus so fired up. Always angry, never satisfied, always looking for something to be outraged about. Who wants to live life that way?

    8 years ago at 1:06 pm
    1. JohnFratYatesSommers

      -Enrolls in $60,000/year Ivy League school
      -Majors in women’s studies/social justice/underwater basket weaving
      -Skips classes to protest social issues
      -Graduates late with shit grades in a useless major
      -Zero job prospects and 200 grand in debt

      “The system is rigged against me”

      -Votes for Bernie Sanders

      8 years ago at 4:20 pm
      1. Robbybil

        fuck off liberal, go live in your fantasy land were your problems are always someone else’s fault

        8 years ago at 10:50 pm
      2. White Male Privilege

        Do us a favor, go back to your safe place and chug bleach. We don’t blame others for our failures over here you liberal, PC whiny useless fucktard.

        8 years ago at 11:02 am
    2. If you feel the bern see a medical professional

      Bernie voters thrive by living that way. Duh

      8 years ago at 5:04 pm
  3. Pro Box Eater

    You wasted $150,000 on an education you coulda got for $1.50 in late fees at the public library.

    8 years ago at 1:07 pm
      1. JohnFratYatesSommers

        It’s sad how few people seem to know what you and box eater are referencing.

        8 years ago at 4:24 pm
    1. AXPeeInHerButt

      Readily acknowledging that you have no intentions of returning it on time. TFM.

      8 years ago at 1:43 pm
  4. JackDanielsrunning

    Protests are as close as ivy’s get to riots. Despite my objection to their perverted sense of justice and equity, I respect their desire to feel like they’re part of an important group that holds a common set of values and working to achieve a goal. Plus maybe now ivy’s will change their selection process to actually get students who are academically/professionally driven instead of academically impressive and driven solely by a desire to make their over sensitive liberal helicopter parents happy.

    8 years ago at 1:10 pm
    1. Theta_Theta

      I hope different kids get in too but it’s not always easy to distinguish when each student is a GPA an SAT score and maybe an essay or two

      8 years ago at 1:29 pm
      1. JackDanielsrunning

        They also look at school districts making it difficult for rural and students in inner city public city schools to compete with charters, magnets, and wealthy suburban schools who can afford better academic programming.

        8 years ago at 1:37 pm
      2. JackDanielsrunning

        Students with identical GPAs and test scores get overlooked because their school couldn’t afford AP classes so they can’t be ready for Harvard. I was lucky enough to go to a wealthy suburban school that allowed me to get enough of a jump on my physics degree that I’ve failed the two math classes, one of them twice, and I’m still able to graduate on time. A kid with no AP credit is more than capable of getting an Ivy League physics degree in 4 years and the fact that these kids are failing because they’re at school to be heard not taught makes me sick to my stomach.

        TL;DR Fuck you Asian kid from highschool who went to Harvard and flunked out because people assume you’re good at math.

        8 years ago at 1:47 pm
  5. Keep It Buttery

    It’s a choice, “traumatized student”. You did that to yourself. Idiot.

    8 years ago at 1:12 pm
      1. Brotein Shake

        I’m beginning to think your stabs at sarcasm just aren’t hitting their mark.

        8 years ago at 3:39 pm
      2. FratchetMan

        It’s probably not racist to assume any minority who disagrees with you regarding the legacy of racism in America who attends a more prestigious school than you do only achieved the feat because of affirmative action. Minorities are incapable of achievement without handouts, if I understand you correctly.

        8 years ago at 10:32 pm
      3. FratchetMan

        Pretty sure that you claim UA’s drug testing is profiling while you profile progressive minorities in ivy leagues, hell minorities at D-1 schools, as being accepting solely because of affirmative action. Pretty inconsistent and insolent.

        8 years ago at 10:37 pm
    1. Jingles

      Phenomenal academically. Misguided and blind socially. I’m marginally convinced that a fair portion of these SJWs aren’t actually dumb and are just looking for attention on what they know is a misplaced sense of self-righteous. Which I find to be worse, I’d rather have you fully and 100% what you’re making a big deal about.

      8 years ago at 1:44 pm
      1. Fratcisco Coronado

        There’s a reason you don’t see many attractive girls at these protests

        8 years ago at 4:24 pm
      2. Edwin Epps TFM

        Even though it is misguided, these protests still involve to much thinking and work for your average pretty girl.

        8 years ago at 4:44 pm
  6. Sarahpalinsovaries

    Their willful ignorance is giving me a micro aggression. (Is that how I word it?)

    8 years ago at 1:39 pm
  7. Edwin Epps TFM

    Goddammit. These people are wasting someone else’s education on bullshit. Newsflash; you’re not the Freedom Riders, you’re not suffraggets, you’re not even fucking hippies. I like Blank Panthers better than these aforementioned groups. All these groups had legitimate things to protest, even if they didn’t go about it in the best way. These SJWs need to have stop signs shoved into their rectums.

    8 years ago at 1:58 pm