Kid Comes Up With The Perfect Excuse For His Confiscated Beer Bong
When it comes to dorm life, you can end up with two kinds of room monitors. There’s the guy who takes his job way too seriously and will meticulously search through his hall’s dorms for contraband, and the guy who will walk in on you mid bong-rip and ask for a hit. Unfortunately for this college student, he was stuck with the former.
When a Residential Life Coordinator confiscated his beer bong during an inspection, he received an email asking who would take responsibility for the dangerous and illegal contraband.
The student responded with the best possible email, and said the alleged “beer bong” was actually “a high capacity enema funnel” to help him with his “chronic bowel obstructions.”
Nailed it. I like to think he got his enema funnel back, along with a sincere apology and maybe a laxative or two..
Image via Imgur
TPikeM.
10 years ago at 9:28 amYeah. So?
10 years ago at 1:58 pmSo….Fuck Pike.
10 years ago at 2:10 pmTHAT made me laugh.
10 years ago at 9:43 amIn case you’re curious….. http://poopreport.com/phpBB/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=1412
10 years ago at 9:51 amHe is hinting that it’s used for butt chugging
10 years ago at 9:59 amHow many seconds are in a minute in your world?
10 years ago at 2:52 pmThat’s gotta be a pain in the ass
10 years ago at 10:13 am#buttapperatusstuff2015
10 years ago at 10:20 amIf you wanted an excuse that would actually work, tell them your transmission has a slow leak, and it fits perfectly over the dipstick tube so you use it to keep it topped off.
10 years ago at 11:23 amDoing your own car maintenance. NF. Delegate that shit to the pledges or the poors.
10 years ago at 12:28 pmDoing your own car maintenance is just what grown men do, you lazy fuck.
10 years ago at 1:57 pmShut up and fix my transmission, pledge.
10 years ago at 12:43 pmHow can a college freshman be a better satire writer than most of the “professionals” on the TFM staff?
10 years ago at 11:51 amBecause he’s not a Grandex employee
10 years ago at 1:00 pmExcept what if he’s not lying.
10 years ago at 1:15 pmIf you were so broke that you had to use a beer bong for your makeshift enema, would you really want to share that with the world?
10 years ago at 4:43 pmTTennesseePikeM.
10 years ago at 1:28 pmYou can just limit to TPikeM. Just cause you haven’t gotten caught doesn’t mean you don’t do it.
10 years ago at 2:51 pm