Let’s Not Hold The Current UCLA Pi Kappa Phi Chapter Responsible For Its Dopey 2013 Chapter Minutes

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Pi Kapp at UCLA is in some hot water after a student government official released minutes from the fraternity’s 2013 chapter meetings. Many are going to point out that a few of the bullet points on the documents are misogynistic or racially insensitive.

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Yawn. Sorry, but this just isn’t moving the needle for me anymore. Not to mention the current Pi Kapp chapter is completely different than it was three years ago. Trust me. As a guy that graduated in 2013 and has since gone back to his own fraternity, it’s fucking night and day. Familiar faces are few and far between.

But since this is apparently an issue at UCLA right now, I decided to actually dig into the minutes and found things that the chapter should answer for.

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Now this is grounds for removal. Downright indefensible. Under no circumstance should any self-respecting man be this excited for Macklemore.

Someone be friends with Coleman before he jumps off a bridge.

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Hey guys, maybe if you had a little edge and stopped referring to the competition as “Chill” you’d win a damn intramural game. Marshmallow soft.

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Tabling a bylaw to the spring when it’s week 1 of the fall semester? Solid bounce back.

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Really need to clarify that the sea slug does indeed shed his penis, but that another grows back within a day.

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Be chivalrous, guys. Leave the TP for the ladies.

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No mention of what to do with your legs or point of entry? It’s all about as little splash as possible.

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Styrofoam cups? Low-tier trash move. I change my previous statements. Nationals should revoke your charter now and blackball all of you squids.

[via Daily Bruin]

Image via UCLA.edu

  1. JohnnieWalker_Blue

    I did coke with Macklemore last year. Wish I had that line back. What a fucking tweak

    9 years ago at 2:09 pm
    1. FratsAndStats

      how about instead of commenting on every article and getting down voted to high hell, you sit the next couple out and bring something clever or witty, you wasted orgasm

      9 years ago at 2:32 pm
      1. FratsAndStats

        you seemed to not heed my advice and prove my point in the same comment, spectacular.

        9 years ago at 3:56 pm
  2. nmg315

    SpeakBeat ran a poll asking UCLA students who should be held accountable, since I can’t post the screenshot, the results were:

    A. No one. They did nothing wrong. (3%)
    B. Whoever leaked the documents. The statements were made in private. (18%)
    C. Pi Kappa Phi. Eta Sigma should know better than to say these things. (25%)
    D. Greek Life. Perpetuating racism and rape culture is unacceptable. (15%)
    E. Move on. It’s been 3 years. Those responsible likely graduated already. (39%)

    9 years ago at 2:23 pm
    1. Coolnamewastaken

      Only 3% huh? That’s sad. Do guys here think the statements were horribly offensive?

      9 years ago at 3:02 pm
    2. mosthonorableactive

      The secretary who’s dumb enough to put that shit into the minutes in the first place. You shouldn’t be fucking up the easiest job on exec this badly

      9 years ago at 3:37 pm
      1. Aubrey Drake Graham

        To be fair, he probably put these in to be funny like my chapter’s secretary does. Otherwise, I’d probably never bother to read the minutes

        9 years ago at 12:26 pm
    3. 1_Rugey_Jentelman

      Why didn’t they expand the blame even further? Where are my options for the entire campus or all college students or all of academia ever? There are millions of Greeks, all of whom should be held accountable according to 15%. Just wondering why the line was drawn here. And no way the host is biased.

      9 years ago at 8:11 pm
      1. olderthanyou

        Isn’t this an indictment of our whole system? Say what you will but I will not stand here while you trash the United States of America.

        9 years ago at 10:46 pm
  3. PoliticallyIncorrect

    Given that our National office is the biggest group of square peg ankle grabbers, these guys probably will get their charter revoked over this

    9 years ago at 5:11 pm
  4. Drunk Chris Berman

    Just a bunch of worthless SJWs looking for another way to be the victim

    9 years ago at 8:52 pm