Mailbag: Pledging With No Colon And Rushing As An Upperclassman

WJ Cope6 years ago

Welcome to the TFM Mailbag, wherein I will answer your questions to the best of my ability. Send your questions to [email protected]. No topics are off limits.

Hey Wes

I’m starting up school in April at community college and possibly planning to go to a 4 year school before I get my AA depending on one thing. I’m 24 and have been in and out of school for a while now because I have schizophrenia and have been delusional as shit to the point of pretty much being non-functioning. I’m doing better now and my question is if I were to rush a frat at a four year school would any fraternities accept me and give me a bid if they thought I was cool or would they think I’m too old? I feel like it wouldn’t be a big deal because we’re all there to have a good time. I’m not that responsible of an adult yet but I’m still curious and have this question because I think it’d be fun to have the fun side of the college experience and I’m worried I’m too old.

I hate to say it, but it sounds like you should give up on that particular dream. You have every right to enjoy the time you have in college, but joining a fraternity at age 24 is and should be out of the question. Even in my final year of fraternity life at age 22, I just felt kind of weird being around so many 18- and 19-year-olds.

At that point in your life, there’s so much more available than what Greek life can give you. You can even rent a car at a reasonable rate! That part of your life has passed you by, but it’s alright. I know some of the readers will say “But Wes, what about veterans that return from duty and rush when they’re in their mid-20s? This might be unpopular, but I think that’s a little off. The fact is, they’re 24 or 25 and have seen some real shit so wanting to hang out around 18 and 19-year-olds that don’t have the self-discipline to make a Tuesday noon class just doesn’t add up.

Hey Wes, I’m currently at a pretty small public school in upstate South Carolina where Greek life is basically non-existent. I’m probably going to transfer to Coastal Carolina next fall and I’m thinking about rushing. All I’m wondering is if it’s really worth it to rush and if you should just pledge to whoever bids on you.
-Thanks

I feel like I’ve answered a billion questions about transferring schools at this point, so feel free to refer to the other mailbag columns I’ve done in the past few weeks. But you went on to ask if it’s worth it to rush, and that’s going to be a yes. Being a year removed from Greek life, I couldn’t care less about my national fraternity anymore. However, I’m incredibly greatful I joined Greek life and made as many friendships and connections as I did. You will be too.

And as for the second part of your question, you’ve just got to field your offers and figure out which group of guys is right for you. Where will you have the most fun? Where will you meet the most people? Figure out what your goals and priorities are at Coastal Carolina, and tailor your search to whatever you come up with.

Hey Wes,

Let’s say here I’m a hypothetical high school student, about to enter college at UArk in the fall and planning to rush. I really wanna join a fraternity but I have IBD (Inflammatory Bowel Disease) and lost my colon. So yeah, I need to shit… a lot. #NoColonStillRollin. Kinda worried about pledging and the processes it entails. Really just looking for some advice on how to handle rush and pledging with my “shitty” condition. All hypothetically. Of course.

Hey, no need to speak in hypotheticals. Some people have colons and some don’t. That’s life. My first word of advice to you would be to know your drinking limits and never exceed them. For you, getting blackout drunk could result in a far browner situation than you’d like, so it’s probably best to stay on the safe side. That reduces your chances of shitting the bed in a party situation, or in general.

As for pledging, you’ll want to be as up-front as possible to whichever house you decide to go with. If you had asthma, you’d want them to know about that, and this is no different. If your condition has any effect on the decision a fraternity makes about whether to take you or not, they’re fucking losers and you don’t need to go with them anyway. But making sure they know about your condition will allow them to help you if anything goes wrong, and it could make all the difference when the shit hits the fan. Also, thank you for the best hashtag I’ve seen in years. You’re going to have a bowel in college, but you can colon me if you need more advice..

Remember to send any and all questions you have to [email protected].