Meet Harambe McHarambeface, The Jinhua Zoo’s Lovable New Baby Gorilla
The Jinhua Zoo, in China’s central Zhejiang province, held a naming contest for its new baby gorilla. No problem, I’m sure they were thinking, as the Harambe craze likely never caught steam on the other side of the planet. The people have spoken, though — overwhelmingly at 93% of votes — and the people have officially named the lovable infant primate Harambe McHarambeface.
Harambe McHarambeface!!!
When the contest was announced, the name Heijin (laaaaame) quickly jumped out to an early lead with over several hundred votes. Americans — because everything is one big goddamn joke to us, apparently — then found a link to the contest, nominated the name Harambe McHarambeface, passed it around social media, and now there is a legit baby gorilla in China named Harambe McHarambeface.
Incredible.
So chatter is starting to surface saying this story could be a hoax. I choose to believe it’s real, though, because the world needs a baby gorilla named Harambe McHarambeface..
[via Boston Leader]
Image via Shutterstock
Please stop. You’re just beating a dead gorilla.
8 years ago at 11:35 amI’d fuck a passed out gorilla, maybe not a dead one though. That Roger Dorn is really sick.
8 years ago at 3:03 pmI know you’re trying to be funny, but that username is not cool man
8 years ago at 6:37 pmMore more like spanking the monkey… I’ll see myself to the door
8 years ago at 3:53 pmDorn lets this Brock turner account on here but deletes my comment which wasn’t even bad..fuck you dorn
8 years ago at 3:55 pmI’m just a serial killer/cannibal, not a rapist. Chill
8 years ago at 7:50 pmI legit thought the pic in the header of the article was Barack Obama.
8 years ago at 5:13 pmWhat’s with all the high schoolers trolling the comments with dumb ass shit?
8 years ago at 7:17 pmI graduated a top 50 university buddy, nice try though!
8 years ago at 8:18 pmNo, no you didn’t.
8 years ago at 11:24 pmYou haven’t even gradutated high school, pal. If you’re going to try and fool us, be a bit more subtle.
8 years ago at 12:29 pmFuck China
8 years ago at 11:37 amFuck you
8 years ago at 11:52 amFuck you
8 years ago at 12:06 am10/10 would shoot if it stopes these jokes
8 years ago at 11:48 amHave you really gone your entire life spelling stops wrong?
Also I’m baked so like I’m really curious
8 years ago at 1:19 pmWould it be not PC if someone dressed as harambe for Halloween.. Asking for a friend..
8 years ago at 11:57 amIt’s like 2016-blackface is always out of line….I Srs can’t even right now
8 years ago at 12:14 pmShow us your tits!
8 years ago at 12:19 pmYeah. Still Asian Hun. Tits are still as microscopic as a white dudes testosterone levels.
8 years ago at 12:30 pmSo I’m reading into that comment that you play for the dark side. GTFO, we don’t take kindly to your types round here.
8 years ago at 1:05 pmHow exactly? I literally stated im asian-as in of japanese descent…we’re not particularly famous for producing self-degrading sluts….you on the other hand…
8 years ago at 2:54 pmYou’re too fucking stupid to insult.
8 years ago at 4:17 pm*er-mah0gerd youre like so stupid lol”..way to show me dear.
8 years ago at 4:43 pmWomen are meant to be seen not heard. Now show us those dairy bags.
8 years ago at 8:03 pmYou’re right blackface is pretty offensive.. However, show us your tits.
8 years ago at 12:23 pmI think I read somewhere that the whole Grambling football team is wearing that costume this year.
8 years ago at 12:21 pmShow us your butthole then!
8 years ago at 1:01 pmIf only someone would make a t-shirt to commemorate his birth. It will be the coolest thing in the high school yearbook.
8 years ago at 12:16 pmHe’s too old for you, Dorn. (Somebody had to say it.)
8 years ago at 12:27 pmBut goddamn that’s a cute gorilla
8 years ago at 12:31 pm