Melissa Click Has An INSANE Theory As To Why Mizzou Fired Her

El Taco9 years ago

The white privilege train has come full circle. Garbage human Melissa Click, who apparently can’t stand not getting media attention for more than five seconds, now says the University of Missouri fired her because she’s white.

In an interview with The Chronicle of Higher Education, Click detailed everything from why she got involved with the protestors to why she thought yelling expletives at a police officer was acceptable. The full article is full of one mind-boggling statement after another.

But let’s start here:

Under pressure from state legislators, she says, Missouri’s Board of Curators fired her to send a message that the university and the state wouldn’t tolerate black people standing up to white people. ‘This is all about racial politics,’ she says. ‘I’m a white lady. I’m an easy target.’

Yeah right. Why would anyone fire you because you’re white?! That’s not possible. You can’t lose your job because you’re whit…oh that’s right. The group of students you were supporting wanted UM Systems President Tim Wolfe to resign or be fired because he was white. Remember how they demanded he admitted his white privilege? Funny how life is like that.

So if what you’re saying is correct (which it’s not and you got fired for being a psycho) then in actuality you kind of fired yourself, didn’t you?

I wish that was the only cringe-worthy moment of the interview. But don’t worry, ol’ Clicky’s got a few more life stories to get off her chest.

Ms. Click is wary. She leaves the house bracing for confrontation. Strangers do notice her. ‘Don’t worry,’ said a clerk at the automotive-repair shop, ‘we don’t hate you.’ Wherever she goes, there is judgment. The owner of an antique store and a greeter at the polls each told her they thought the university was wrong. Two young men she passed near the campus asked her if she needed some muscle. She considered it a threat.

As she walks through downtown Columbia, an African-American man yells his support out a car window: ‘Hey, Melissa!’ (‘Black people love me,’ she tells a reporter.) Later, a black woman runs out of the Campus Bar and Grill headlong into an embrace with Ms. Click. It’s one of the protest organizers. Soon three black students surround the former professor. They sound protective. How is she? They’re concerned. They tell her they love her.

Oh baby. This one’s loaded. Let’s unpack this one.

She considered two guys asking her if she needed muscle a threat — which is absolutely hilarious. Maybe they were just two young, strapping fellows who were a fan of her work against journalists. Maybe they were coming from the rec center, looking to show off the massive biceps to the next sexy chick that walked by. Maybe they were mocking her and repeating exactly what asked for months ago to get a reporter out of her safe space. She didn’t seem to have a problem with the four-letter phrase back then.

Also, the phrase “black people love me” is the icing on the looney tunes cake. That’s exactly what people say when they’re trying to prove they’re not racist. I fully expect that phrase to come out of Donald Trump’s mouth in the next few months. If black people love you, there’s no reason for you to say it. Stop being a fucking try-hard.

One final blurb before we depart:

Her nerves are perpetually on edge. In the dairy aisle of the grocery store, Ms. Click is vigilant. She takes a quick look around as she glances at the flier, then reaches for two packages of shredded cheese on sale.

She imagines someone watching. ‘Look,’ she says in a high-pitched voice. ‘There’s Melissa Click, using coupons!’ But no one is there.

Click, you’ve officially become unhinged..

[via The Chronicle of Higher Education]

Image via YouTube