Penn State Unveils Sick New $12 Million Locker Room, Will Never Escape Penn State Locker Room Jokes

SteveHolt9 years ago

College football is back, losers.

With less than a month until opening kickoff, college football programs across the country are gearing up for fall camp this weekend. Excitement is at an all-time high for fans, who will inevitably be crushed and cynical three weeks into September. That is the beauty of college football.

Penn State is celebrating the return to college football with a brand new team locker room. Take a look at all the new amenities, which should hopefully include one of those emergency buttons that notifies campus police.

I’m not sure that’s the phrasing I would have used, but whatever.

All jokes aside, that is a pretty sweet looking locker room. It better be since it cost $12 million. I’d be pretty pumped to finally have something cool happen to me if I was one of these Penn State football players. I mean, it’s not like they have much else going on, being a perpetually above average but not great team, and all. Sick locker rooms do very little to improve on the field play but can definitely help with recruiting. Penn State needs all the help it can get, going up against recruiting God Urban Meyer and the Ohio State Buckeyes.

Congrats on the new locker room, Nittany Lions. Let’s treat this one a little better than that old one, why don’t we?.