POLL: How Many Justin Bieber Clones Could You Take On At Once?

 

Imagine a scenario where you got to bare-knuckle fight Justin Bieber with no strings attached. He can’t press charges. He’s not carrying any weapons. No one is there to break it up. No repercussions whatsoever. Just you, The Biebs, and both of your fists. Sounds awesome, right? You could take him down, couldn’t you? How badly though?

Now, imagine fighting two Biebers. Could you still win? How about three? Or five? Imagine if there were 25 Biebers. Could you still win the brawl? It’s like a gang fight, but you’re the only one in your gang. That’s the shitty part. The awesome part is the other gang is just full of a bunch of Justin Biebers. Would you still win the fight? Just barely, or comfortably? What’s the maximum number of Biebs you could you take on at once and still come out victorious?

The Bieber Profile:

Age: 19

Height: 5’7″ per IMDB (probably a generous measurement)

Weight: approximately 115 lbs.

Country of origin: Canada

Occupation: Douchebag/Musician

Best known for: “Baby Baby Baby” and being a douchebag

Hobbies: Playing guitar, singing, dating hot Latina girls, sagging his pants, driving fast through neighborhoods, spitting on people, taking his shirt off, lifting light weights, making this face, doing the backwards piece sign, hanging out with douchebags, being a douchebag, looking like a lesbian, being from Canada, getting stupid tattoos, wearing earrings, hanging out with guys that weigh under 120 lbs., pissing in mop buckets in bars, cussing out pictures of former U.S. presidents, dressing like an asshole, and just generally acting like an asshole

Fighting technique: unknown, but presumably flailing his tiny fists while retreating, also probably kicks

POLL QUESTION:

[poll id=4]

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  1. austing

    Instead of hypothetical Bieber clones, how about we talk about how many Selena clones we could slam before we collapse of exhaustion

    12 years ago at 1:29 pm
    1. Tallapoosa Snu

      I would disappoint the shit out of at least 8 Selena Gomez’s before I couldn’t go on.

      12 years ago at 3:38 pm
  2. TexasCP

    I think I would probably just pick up a never ending momentum after beating up the 100th one and restore balance to music.

    12 years ago at 1:34 pm
  3. IotaKappa771

    I probably would go with just one. that way, I can focus all my drunken rage and hate on one target. quality over quantity.

    12 years ago at 1:36 pm
  4. OMFratRebel

    He weighs 115 pounds? This would explain why he is never 10 feet away from at least 3 people and a bodyguard.

    12 years ago at 1:41 pm
  5. Frat Ross Ewing

    I know I could take 7-9 of them because I’ve got 6 inches and 60 pounds on him as well as some training and experience, but I lack the modivation. I don’t hate him, I don’t like him, he could litterally not exist and it wouldn’t change a damn thing about my life.

    12 years ago at 1:56 pm
    1. Carlos Spicyweiner

      is dyslexia that disease where you make up excuses that have nothing to do with your grammar mistake?

      11 years ago at 10:58 pm
    2. Frat Ross Ewing

      Uh, yeah, that was totally a grammatical mistake and not at all a spelling error. And putting letters in the wrong place and thinking of the wrong letter have absolutely nothing to do with spelling.

      11 years ago at 6:27 pm
  6. Runk Nasty 1855

    Actually all of that is true. Like I said, kid acts like a douche I wouldn’t fight him for what he’s done with his life though.

    12 years ago at 2:06 pm
  7. Rihanna Deserved It

    after i kill the first one i’d break off a leg bone and use that as a weapon to kill an infinite amount of biebses. i’d probably get a nobel peace prize

    12 years ago at 4:14 pm