Pornhub Engineers Lifelike “TwerkingButt” Masturbation Device

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Getting laid is hard after you graduate from college. You usually have to take a girl out before she gives it up. Unfortunately, I have this weird OCD thing where I have to shout the name of the food I’m eating before I put it in my mouth. Makes dinner dates awkward as hell.

To worsen my situation, my makeshift sex toy – a pile of cold cuts stuffed between two sofa cushions and a photo of Topanga from “Boy Meets World” – has started to lose its appeal. Luckily, after four years of hard work, the scientists at Pornhub have built my saving grace.

The TwerkingButt is a lifelike, disembodied posterior for you to stick your dick in. It jiggles like a real booty thanks to programmable twerking patterns and Cyberskin, which is composed of “spring-like, high resiliency bonds” that make it malleable and able to return to its original form.

It also comes with virtual reality goggles that display 3D pornographic content via the TwerkingButt phone app. You can even order the revolutionary invention modeled after your favorite porn star’s ass.

I’m never leaving my room again.

[via TNW News]