Ridiculous Tinder Pickup Lines, Part 5

Crazy things can happen when you swipe right.

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What a good friend.
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Average testicles are not grape sized, Adam.
emilysss
He’s talking about chewing gum, right?
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Is there any other way to poop on someone’s head?
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Probably one of the most cordial insult exchanges I’ve ever seen.
laurasaa
Happens to the best of us.
courntyesaaa
I respect his attempt.
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Aaaaaaand we’re back to butt stuff.
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My rabbit shits get me pretty horny, too.
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Just answer the man’s question, Bree.
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It only took 4 messages before she wanted to run him over with a truck. That must be a record.
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His patronus is a frock.
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Only responding to Tinder messages after they win the natty for UConn. It’s a TSM.
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The convo clearly peaked when he brought up his fancy penis.
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Communication is key in any budding relationship.
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What kind of parent lets their daughter go by “Claude?”
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Giving your number to accused and professed, but not charged, kiddy fiddlers. It’s a TSM.
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Smooth as butter.

If you have a hilarious Tinder interaction, send it to [email protected].

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This all made sense to me except for the peanut butter.
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This guy. TDornM.
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Rachel, you thieving bitch.
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I bet that one killed in the 7th grade lunch line.
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Taking off her bra. TFM. Drinking her broth. It’s a TFM.
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I heard he’s a pretty cool guy.
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I’m at a loss for words… unlike this guy.
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You’re the joke, Keenen.
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I guess he wanted to figure out the last digit himself?
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And he never fucks with caps lock.
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Yes, being able to drive 82 miles to get that ass is just one of the many perks of owning a Honda.
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That sounds like the basis for a healthy relationship.
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#Romance
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He’s got a point.
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I assume he followed up by asking if she would be down to give him head while a female she’s never met tickles his balls.

If you have a hilarious Tinder interaction, send it to [email protected].

  1. Frat_Tire

    The kid who told the girl it was a fraternity ritual should be blackballed. House business is house business. Pledge or not a pledge.

    10 years ago at 6:09 pm
  2. 21st Century Goose

    I spit my chew all over the wall, laughing, while reading the turtle one

    10 years ago at 6:28 pm