Scientists Say Men Who Sit Down To Pee May Have An Improved Sex Life
Now, I’m not 21 years old yet, so I’m not legally allowed to have sex. I’ve heard some great things, though. I can’t wait until I finally turn the big two-one and can indulge in all of these awesome frat staples in which the law currently prevents me from participating. Even when I am legally allowed to be that blacked out, whiskey-dicked gentleman who knows nothing about how to pleasure a woman, I would never listen to what these Swedish scientists are saying about a way to improve your sex life.
Medical research reported in Sweden’s Folket newspaper said that sitting might mean reduced prostate cancer risk and be better for you in the bedroom. That’s because the bladder empties more efficiently when men take a seat while urinating, and this improved bladder release supposedly decreases prostate problems and allows for a longer and healthier sex life.
Men standing while we pee is the only thing separating women and men’s bathrooms. If every man sat down while he peed, there would be no need for the urinal, the mecca of masculinity. How would I assert my dominance over all of the GDIs in the bathroom by doing the pants-down shirt-up little boy pee if there were no urinals to do it at? Not only that, but then every bathroom would be unisex. This would mean listening to bathroom girltalk. I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t want to hear about lipstick, tampons, and Jonathan Taylor Thomas while I’m trying to peacefully masturbate in a Chili’s bathroom.
The lesson to be learned here is that doing something NF, even if it is to achieve a frat goal, is NF. It’s like buttchugging. Yeah, it gets you drunk faster, but at what cost? Your anal virginity. And that’s something I, for one, hope to keep until the day I die.
[via Mens Fitness]
I feel that sitting down to pee strips you of your manhood anyway
13 years ago at 2:58 pmI think there is something to this, when you flush and your dong gets pulled down the pipe it stretches it out a bit then doing this more and more next thing you know you have to tuck that monster in your sock
13 years ago at 4:40 pmDont take the ability to pee anywhere we want with ease away from us Mr. Scientists, youre being an asshole
13 years ago at 5:43 pmIt’s is only acceptable to sit on the toilet when you have to shit. Otherwise, you are either a girl or a flaming gay fuck. That’s why I had a urinal installed in my house, so there would be no debate.
13 years ago at 5:46 pmWhat If I have to shit and piss at the same time?
13 years ago at 9:34 amWhile you were busy being a homophobe, you overlooked the fact that gay men have the same genitals as straight men, which deems your theory worthy of one used urinal cake.
13 years ago at 3:13 amMasturbating in a Chili’s bathroom, TFM.
13 years ago at 4:02 pmT1MFM
13 years ago at 5:36 pmWhat about jerking off? Stand up or lay down?
13 years ago at 5:03 pmWhere is the age of consent 21, outside of Bahrain? I think maybe your parents lied to you so you wouldn’t have sex. The highest age of consent in the US is 18, and in some states is still 16. To think you’ve been withholding from sex because you thought it was illegal has me thinking maybe your parents are Mormon or something? Interesting that no one else has pointed this out to you. Good luck.
9 years ago at 8:09 pm