Sig Ep President Mike Cocke Takes You On A Tour Of The Mansion They Just Lost To GDIs

I get it, “enough with the Sig Ep shit already.”

I know we’ve covered this saga extensively, and even updated the story from yesterday about their eviction, but there’s just something about a guy named Mike Cocke jovially leading a house tour of the mansion that he and his chapter are unknowingly about to lose that I had to run with. It’s just too good.

I mean look at Mike Cocke’s face here:

Screen shot 2013-05-29 at 1.55.16 PM

The kid’s got it all, so giddy. Just on top of the world. Little does he know it’s about to all come crashing down and get ripped right out of his hands, and not just that remote control — the whole shebang.

Let Mr. Cocke take you on a tour of their brand new $5 million home. Embedding has been disabled, so CLICK HERE to watch the video.

Here are a few of the observations I made while watching:

1. Heather Smart Evans has some serious sex appeal.

2. Right on the golf course. Damn.

3. Mike goes by Michael, but who’s he kidding?

4. This house is ridiculous.

5. Mike Cocke is a little camera shy.

6. Forced and awkward laugh at 1:30 felt forced and awkward.

7. $100 says the girl at 1:57 is below a 4 in the facial region. That’s why she didn’t turn to face the camera.

8. I want that kitchen for my house.

9. Mike Cocke lets us know he doesn’t do any dishes. Power move.

10. Boom. Elevator.

11. VT jersey + no shoes = just got laid.

12. They “lax” in the lawn when a golf course is right outside. Shameful.

13. N64. Solid.

14. At 4:00, hey doofus, your flag is hanging the wrong way. Shape up or ship out.

15. Farewell, Mike Cocke. For good.

***

  1. PhiPsiPhrat

    You totally got me, Dorn. I clicked on the video solely to see this Heather Smart Evans fox. I find your taste in women to be unnerving.

    12 years ago at 2:31 pm
  2. Natty light

    Ok so which one of these tools decided it was a cool idea to put Pokemon cards in the trophy case?

    12 years ago at 2:33 pm
  3. natty_splatties

    Ridiculous, just for stealing Fiji composites, or so the rumor goes? Fuck those Fijis.

    12 years ago at 2:35 pm
    1. FratyFrenchman

      Yes because I’m sure the FIJIs asked for them to be kicked out of their house

      12 years ago at 7:08 pm
    2. RELee1865

      They didn’t get in trouble for stealing composites. They got in trouble because one of their pledges didn’t get reimbursed for a DD shift and his dad complained.

      12 years ago at 8:05 am
  4. brocaine1901

    Can you please keep an eye on this Mike Cocke character? He’s got some real star potential here. Maybe make a weekly article about his travels and tribulations? All I’m saying is, who doesn’t want more of Mike Cocke?

    12 years ago at 2:41 pm