Some Drunk Assholes On ATVs Tore Up The Greens At The Shell Houston Open Golf Course

This story has me split between two things I’m deeply passionate about: golf and mindless drunken destruction. On one hand, tearing up the greens of a golf course that annually holds a PGA event is utterly barbaric. Yes, it’s merely the site of the Shell Houston Open — not the sacred grounds of Augusta — but this ain’t your local muni, where putting through World War I trench warfare on the greens has virtually no effect on the 30-handicap hacks playing Top Flites anyway. No, when you’re paying premium dollar to be a country club member, you usually can swing the wrenches a bit and should never be subjected to craters next to the fucking flagstick.

That being said, the day I’m above getting shithoused before doing donuts in an ATV and slinging dirt with reckless abandon is the day you can put me out of my misery and euthanize my lame ass.

[h/t Golf Channel]

Image via Twitter

  1. frat17

    Tear up your rival houses yard, anyone that fucks with a golf course deserves a 9 iron to the temple.

    9 years ago at 5:35 pm
  2. Shirtless_Bandit

    Drunkenly hooning quads & bikes is the most fun one can have without having to cuddle afterwards in my opinion. That said, save it for private land or ORV parks. Jackasses like this ruin it for all of us.

    9 years ago at 5:48 pm
  3. Bulldawg1

    If someone did that to my club course or house they had better start running because we are coming for them.

    9 years ago at 7:07 pm
  4. That drunk brother

    Quit lying to yourselves. Everyone who’s been on a golf course has had this idea cross their mind

    9 years ago at 8:36 am