South Carolina’s Kicker Destroyed The Back Window Of A Car With An Errant Kick


This kid’s got some leg.

Usually when you hear about broken car windows and sports you think baseball, and monster, glass shattering home runs. Or maybe some basketball mixtape dude trying to jump over a speeding car, failing, and irreparably maiming his once agile body. Hell, Melky Cabrera just wrecked some Sawx fan’s car parked outside of Fenway a few weeks ago.

Melky absolutely crushed that ball (dude’s got power, I wonder what his workout regimen is like…) and it still didn’t do half the damage that South Carolina kicker Elliot Fry did to the window.

Not only is the fact that Fry’s shot was more damaging hard to believe based on sheer velocity, but a football isn’t nearly as hard as a baseball. The only explanation is that the tip of the football hit the window perfectly, thus totally destroying it. I know these things, you guys, I was a physicist working on the Large Hadron Collider for five years before I left to work at TFM. Before I left we were on the brink of discovering whether or not God really existed, but the benefits were shit and I was all like, “Enough is enough you guys, I am DONE paying so much for Valtrex.”

Anyway, hell of a shot Fry. Hopefully the Head Ball Coach will reimburse the poor guy who owns the car, but my guess is Spurrier will just leave the owner with a quasi-sensical quip and a laugh before jaunting off. All while shirtless, of course. At least a signed visor would be nice.

[via Twitter]

  1. thadcastle2

    It shattered more because back windshields aren’t laminated. Day one stuff Bacon.

    10 years ago at 2:48 pm
  2. AlrightAlrightAlrightt

    An article talking about balls? Are we sure Dorn didn’t write this?

    10 years ago at 2:58 pm
  3. FUBAR1776

    Prince of Peace Christian School High School Alumni and my Eskimo brother. Keep kicking ass bud.

    10 years ago at 3:40 pm
  4. Maddmay

    I played basketball against this all four years of high school. He was a total scrub on the court and it is no surprise he’s a kicker.

    10 years ago at 5:08 pm
    1. FUBAR1776

      yeah well while your boasting about playing basketball against a Division 2 TAPPS High school, he was winning three state soccer championships with me and becoming one of the most recognized kickers in the country.

      10 years ago at 8:09 am
  5. The Prodigal

    You dumb fuck Bacon, The God Particle from CERN has nothing to do with god. I’m starting to think you didn’t actually work for CERN before coming to TFM like the article says.

    10 years ago at 7:40 pm
  6. buddahsmcmansion

    well maybe mizzou kickers aren’t the only one that miss their mark sometimes

    10 years ago at 9:19 pm