Stuff Frat People Like: “The Old Guy”
13 years ago

Nearly every fraternity has one. There is always that one brother who takes the call of collegiate excellence far beyond the typical four year route. Mind you, this is no mere “victory lap” 5th year student; the old guy surpasses this fairly common extension by at least threefold.

The old guy is an absolutely necessary factor to any house’s existence. His finesse for the ability to combine extra majors and minors to delay graduation is comparable to a concert pianist. His nickname is typically derived from some form of military technology (“The Tank,” “Howitzer,” and “The Hydrogen Bomb” are my personal favorites) most likely because of his drunken destructive behavior.

The old guy is always willing to pitch in his opinions about how your house “isn’t the same as it used to be.” While his opinions are valued as a brother, it can tend to become an annoyance when his stories continually start with “In my day…” like a nostalgic grandpa. Yes, we get that your hazing “makes today’s look like kindergarten.” I’m sure the summer of 2005 was just as good as you say it is, but that was before I could even drive.

The old guy can take many forms, and he is not restricted to the persona of a triple-redshirt 8th year slacker. While I’m not condoning bidding a Joseph “Blue” Pulaski of your own, at least it would make for a good story (despite the onslaught of creeped out girls that would follow). I’ve even heard of 30+ year old Marines in fraternities, and I doubt anyone could mentally incapacitate a pledge quite like a Marine.

Whatever form your “old guy” may take, he is a pivotal part to your fraternal experience. For one, you can always count on him to look lazier than you in comparison. You never know when that self esteem boost can come in handy. Also, more seriously, he is a good link between the traditions of your fraternity, and can judge things from a very wide perspective. Most problems your fraternity may come across, be it hazing allegations, massive inter-fraternal brawls, or even a kitchen grease fire, he’s probably seen it before. And don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll take every chance he gets to remind you.

  2. redmerica

    we have a 26 year old army vet active. By far the most respected brother in the house

    13 years ago at 12:14 am
  4. Alfred_Marshall

    There’s a ~70 year old Chi Phi at UVa. Apparently he used to party there when he was normal college age and decided to go back to school a couple years ago. Some old alumnus encouraged the chapter to let him in.

    13 years ago at 12:05 pm
  6. Fratador Owner

    This article calls the old guys lazy and stupid, but suggests we can learn from them? Great idea.

    13 years ago at 7:55 pm
  7. Aggie Fratter

    I pledged and was initiated then left and went to the military. I’ve been back now for 3 years and am a senior… out of common sense, I try to stay away from pledges for the most part.

    13 years ago at 4:25 am
  8. Andrew Fratson

    We had an old guy run the pledges around the flag pole for an hour then sat them down and (obviously in a drunken rage) talked to them for about 90 minutes about how “Remember the Titans” could never really happen because the two races will never actually coexist together.

    13 years ago at 1:08 pm
  10. Caero

    Brothers,

    It’s reassuring to hear the acceptance of military vets in your respective chapters. I, along with 9 other brothers, re-founded a chapter last October and I was in my freshman year. I’m 28 and an Air Force vet. Our first Fall pledge class is incoming starting Sept… >:)

    13 years ago at 5:11 pm
  11. Mr Hazer

    I agree that this article is brilliant. member of the year goes to old guys all the time. always so much passion.
    HI HI HI…

    13 years ago at 5:33 pm