Successfully Sliding Into Her DMs, From A Girl’s Perspective

Not So Sweetheart9 years ago

My friend Cindy was recently asked out for drinks by a fellow intern at her job. They had barely spoken two words to each other in person, and all she knew about him was that he was really, really ridiculously good looking. Unbeknownst to her, word of her crush made its way into Prince Charming’s ear, and he took the opportunity to sweep her off her feet… over LinkedIn.

Social media is an integral part of our lives — it’s just a fact. But how exactly does it fit into dating? Some are obvious. Tinder is for #ButtStuff2016. Snapchat is for flirting and acquiring nudes. Instagram is to mess with girls’ emotions because they read way too much into what a “like” on a photo means. But can you successfully make moves on a girl through LinkedIn, Twitter, or Facebook? Let’s investigate.

LinkedIn

When It Works

LinkedIn is an odd case because its purpose is professional networking rather than strictly social. This will only work if you guys work together, but not closely, and only if you are peers — don’t hit on your manager or the hot intern that works for you. Doing this incorrectly could land you in HR’s office, so you need to be sure that it’s the right situation. You should have good reason to believe she’s interested. If you put the moves on her without any indication that she’s into you or without ever having met her, you’ll look like an unprofessional creep.

How To Play It

Prince Charming’s case met all of the above criteria — they were both interns but didn’t work on anything together, and he heard that Cindy was hot for him. Where he really shined, though, is in his execution. He owned the fact that asking a girl out on LinkedIn is ridiculous, and he turned it into an even more ridiculous joke.

“After reviewing your résumé, and considering our nine alike skills, I think we should get drinks this weekend. Super impressed with the blood donation history by the way. This should work out well since I’m a vampire.”

I couldn’t make up that vampire shit if I tried because it’s so damn random. He made his line more outrageous than the fact that it was being delivered through LinkedIn, and that is exactly how you need to play this one to come across friendly and aware of how silly the whole situation is.

Twitter

When It Works

While most effective if you already know or see the girl around, this is one case where I believe you can make something happen even if you’ve never met the person. You should, however, confirm their existence through friends of friends because getting catfished in this day and age is just embarrassing.

How To Play It

So you’ve followed her for a while, and her tweets are endlessly entertaining to you. On more than one occasion, you’ve thought to yourself, “I want to buy this chick a drink.” Well that is exactly what you’re going to do. Next time she tweets something that you really get a kick out of, you @ her and tell her, “Anyone that can make me laugh that hard deserves a drink. I’m buying.” If you really want to get to the point, you can give her a day and time right then and there, but for the more conservative among you, you can just do that in the direct messages.

Facebook

When It Works

The staple, the classic, the necessity — Facebook is integral to any college student’s life. From project group chats to fraternity groups, to party events, Facebook keeps your finger on the pulse of everything and everyone you know, and some you don’t. Any girl you want to open up the gates with on here needs to be one that you have met, or seen IRL. And not just saw her one time in the coffee shop in real life, I’m talking you have a class together or are always in the coffee shop at the same time every day.

“But Sweetheart, if I see her around all the time, can’t I just use the balls God gave me to ask her out in person?” Yes, you could and should ask her out in person; this advice isn’t for you, you bold son of a bitch. This advice is for the quivering pussies who can’t get two words out in front of a girl until he knows she’s interested.

How To Play It

This move is all about a singular opportunity that you need to watch for. On the day she isn’t in class, or she doesn’t come into the coffee shop, that is when you strike. Add her as a friend, send her a message, and tell her you were bummed you didn’t see her that day because you were going to ask her out to coffee/dinner/formal etc. You’re still basically asking her out, but at the same time, you’re not. Then you just cower behind your keyboard and wait to see if she flirts back.

Cindy said yes, by the way..