Swallowing Makes Girls Happier, Says Science


There are three things in sex that girls have historically avoided like the plague: butt stuff, blow jobs, and bareback. Recent movements like #ButtStuff2015 have made sweeping progress on the first item. Now, maybe with the help of science, we can finally put the other two to rest. It’s pretty well known that many girls cannot stand to give blow jobs. What’s possibly even more difficult to get a girl to come around to is going without a condom, because, you know, babies. Maybe now, with science on our side, the ladies will finally see what they’ve been missing.

Researchers at SUNY Albany found that alongside a guy’s swimmers, there are a whole bunch of mood-altering chemicals and hormones found in semen. Most notably, estrone and oxytocin, two chemicals that elevate mood, in addition to two antidepressant hormones.

From Daily Medical Informatics:

To investigate whether semen has antidepressant effects, the authors rounded up 293 college females from the university’s Albany campus, who agreed to fill out an anonymous questionnaire about various aspects of their sex lives.

Recent sexual activity without condoms was used as an indirect measure of seminal plasma circulating in the woman’s body.

Each participant also completed the Beck Depression Inventory, a commonly used clinical measure of depressive symptoms.

Even after figuring for differences in the frequency of sex, the survey revealed that women who recently did not use a condom during sexual activities, meaning they had nut butter in their system, showed fewer depressive symptoms than even “promiscuous” women who wrap it before they tap it.

Swallowing and going bareback makes girls happier. What more convincing do they need? Sure, it’s an uphill battle to get any girl to ditch condoms since we’re brainwashed from puberty to have sex with one on or not at all. In all likelihood, she hates the idea of her face getting anywhere near your dick. For the sake of her happiness, she can learn to love giving you a Lewinski.

[via Daily Medical Informatics]

Image via Shutterstock

  1. ThePatternIsFull

    Sure, every girl needs to learn to give proper head, but the learning process can be extremely painful if she is flat out terrible at it. No head is better than terrible head

    8 years ago at 9:41 am
    1. Asteroid

      What’s worse is when you have a girl who’s only previous blowjob recipient was apparently a psychopath who liked his dick chewed on like my dog chews a bone so she thinks that’s how you do it. My dick still hurts just thinking about it.

      8 years ago at 9:56 am
    2. FRS

      You have to work through stages of technique development: here from handjob up to BJ.. Just remember that at every point, she has a right to eat your cream.

      8 years ago at 5:57 pm
  2. UMaverick

    Can we just get a page that has all these articles on them. Like this one, the one that says pulling out is just as effective as condoms, the one that says the large majority of girls orgasm from butt stuff, and many others.

    8 years ago at 10:00 am
  3. RisingFratstarOfTX

    “Take twice a day before the meals you make for him. If symptoms persist, increase dosage.”

    8 years ago at 10:06 am