That High School Dork That Was Denied By Kate Upton Landed A MUCH Hotter Prom Date Instead
Bonus video:
Remember this dweeb from YouTube who put the screws to Kate Upton by very publicly asking her to his high school prom?
Here is the original story we ran and here is Jake’s YouTube video if you need a refresher. I just watched it again, and it still makes me sick to my stomach. Kid needs a noogie/wedgie combo like I’ve never given before.
“Jake Davidson here in sunny Los Angeles…”
Roger Dorn here in hot-as-hell Austin, TX, and fuck you, Jake Davidson!
So, Kate, after giving Jake a soft commitment to attend prom with him, eventually said no, or actually, she “couldn’t fit it in her schedule.” Obviously, right? Anyone who ever thought there was a remote possibility of Kate toting those bosomy gifts from God through a high school dance floor was kidding themselves. Those little high school pervs would’ve been rocking little high school boners all night and the line to the men’s room would never have dipped below 75 dudes deep.
“Down goes Jake,” we snickered. “Another nerd bites the dust,” we all thought. Well, fuck that kid. Fuck Jake. Why fuck Jake? Fuck Jake because he actually is going to prom with a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model. And the worst part of it is, this one is like a thousand times hotter than Kate Upton.
It’s Nina Agdal, a brunette, Danish bombshell that was named Rookie of the Year from this year’s Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.
ABC News has the coverage:
The line to the bathroom would have been down the hall if Upton was attending, but now, with this Agdal chick, they may have to order about 30 emergency port-a-johns to line up outside the venue.
[via ABC News]
Images via Instagram
How the fuck did he pull this off
12 years ago at 9:46 pmMostly pity. Don’t feel bad about it. This would never happen to anyone here for that very reason.
12 years ago at 12:17 amI’d take a pity fuck from her any day
12 years ago at 1:13 amYeah she can pity the shit out of me
12 years ago at 12:08 pmKate has nicer chest cannons but taking everything else into account, Nina wins.
12 years ago at 9:47 pmImagine if Kate uptons chest cannons were placed on that girl….
12 years ago at 9:09 pmI guess swing and a miss doesn’t apply here…..
12 years ago at 9:56 pmI would analogize it to a checked-swing home run.
12 years ago at 9:26 amUpton would be the homerun, Nina is the grand SLAM.
12 years ago at 2:11 pmYeah soo…kid gets a bid
12 years ago at 10:01 pmThose photos of Nina had me going straight from from six to midnight.
12 years ago at 10:03 pmI need this chick to defecate on my chest and I needed it yesterday.
12 years ago at 10:12 pmright there with ya slugger
12 years ago at 3:23 pm^ I see what you did there
12 years ago at 6:14 pmholy shit
12 years ago at 10:17 pmPart of me believes this is SI swimsuit models hazing their pledges.
12 years ago at 10:33 pmI wish that was my backup plan
12 years ago at 11:07 pmIn my opinion, this chick is going to be the best wingman there. Think about it. All the little high school nerds will be all eyes on her, so the rest of the girls will demand the attention from their dates. Bada bing, bada boom. High School prom sex.
12 years ago at 11:44 pm^ That’s the best kind.
12 years ago at 12:21 am^^ Great use of “Bada bing, bada boom.”
12 years ago at 9:17 amhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRj-S8Aklcw
12 years ago at 7:32 pm