The War On Freedom

The War On Freedom

Dear concerned citizens,

We are at war, my friends. These are historically important times that we are living in. The balance of power is shifting, and you and I are right in the middle of the crosshairs.

I’m not talking about Iraq, Afghanistan, terrorism, or drugs. Those are Hollywood marionettes designed to boost the bottom line. Those “wars” are all about ratings. I’m not talking about an overseas power grab or some abstract fear-inducing concept. I’m talking about a war happening right here on our front steps. I’m talking about the war on American freedom.

You didn’t know there was a war? Oh, you must not be reading the headlines. Mass murderers are shooting the shit out of everybody in sight with “assault weapons,” and there’s a big push to ban them and enact stricter gun laws. If you haven’t read my previous article on the misinformation of gun control, read it HERE before you continue. Gun control is a proven failure, and it does not address the real problems.

The tragedy inflicted by psychopaths is an unfortunate symptom of a much larger problem, and gun laws are not the solution. Don’t just take it from me. Take it from the father of a 6-year-old massacred at Sandy Hook elementary school.

Gun control doesn’t protect people, it makes them more vulnerable. Look at the facts and do your own research. You’ve got to see the bigger picture. You’ve got to understand why the government wants gun control. They want gun control because they are afraid of armed, freethinking citizens.

Most people take freedom for granted. People forget that America is an unprecedented, revolutionary experiment. We are the only people in the history of the world that have the right to bear arms. In all other nations, if gun ownership is even allowed, it is a privilege, not a right. The government can disarm the people whenever they want. The 2nd amendment shines alone under the shadow of state violence and tyranny.

Guns are part of our culture…part of our identity. We were born in the blood of a violent revolution. We killed for our freedom and the founding fathers weren’t stupid. They were smart motherfuckers. Even when they overthrew the British Empire, they knew that tyranny would inevitably return in one form or another. It always does and it always will.

That’s why they included the 2nd amendment. It wasn’t to ensure that we could go hunting. It’s there to grant the people the God-given right to overthrow oppressive forces, both foreign and domestic. The right of revolution is implicit in the 2nd amendment.

Revolution isn’t a one-night stand with a slam you never call back. It’s the frat mattress that gets tossed back and forth between brothers of all houses. Revolutions are just like seasons. They’re either coming or they just left, but they’re always on the way. Even in the coldest of winter, spring is implied. That’s the way things are. It’s a natural cycle. The formula for human civilization is the same as the formula for ex-girlfriends. Tyranny, revolution, freedom, repeat.

The reason we have a high degree of freedom compared to other nations is because we have a heavily armed populace. With enough organization, the American public could easily overthrow the government. There are over 310 million privately owned guns in America. We’ve got more guns than most world militaries combined. We’re the biggest armed force on the planet.

That’s the only reason we have any rights at all. Thanks to the Patriot Act and the NDAA, our constitutional rights have been raped beyond recognition. We don’t even technically have rights anymore. They’re purely symbolic. Any sort of dissent is now called “domestic terrorism,” and once you’re labeled a terrorist, you’re completely fucked. Black bag-over-the-head Gestapo shit is now perfectly legal without a warrant, without a trial, and without a single fuck given.

Now I’m not saying that we should start a revolution or overthrow the government. That would be counterproductive. That’s also treason, and I love my country. (Dear NSA agent who is reading this article because it set off 50,000 red flags, I am a comedian who writes fiction in order to buy booze. Please don’t send me to summer camp in Cuba.)

What I’m saying is that revolutions don’t have to be violent. A truly free society can change a government with words and ideas. The power of the mind infinitely exceeds the power of the gun, but only when there is freedom. It’s hard to talk about radical ideas when you’re body is full of bullet holes.

Privately owned guns are a necessary safeguard of free expression. Guns ensure that we have a fair dialogue with those who rule over us. The government knows that if they try too much fascist bullshit, there will be an armed revolution. A good government is afraid of its citizens, not the other way around.

Civilian guns are the ultimate checks and balances on power. Fuck congress and fuck the Supreme Court. At the end of the day, it boils down to the fact that an armed population is difficult to enslave.

There is a war going on right now. It’s not a war against terrorism, drugs, or bad guys, it’s a war against freedom. Taking away guns is the final step in the realization of a total police state. Banning assault weapons is a baby step towards a New World Order’s wet dream. The first amendment only exists because of the second amendment. If they take away our guns, then what are you going to do? Talk about tyranny?

Talking about tyranny is terrorism.

Fuck you, citizen.


  1. Southern Knight

    Here’s some Greek on which I’d bet virtually all of us can agree: ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ.

    12 years ago at 6:03 pm
    1. Dwight D Fratenhower

      The south had no chance, and i don’t understand the obsession with the “what-if-the-south-woulda-won” scenarios. seriously, the confederacy couldn’t have won under any circumstances. And even in some weird parallel universe where all of the north got smallpox and the south won, the confederacy would have disintegrated inside of 5 years. those states hated each other almost as much as they hated Lincoln, and the articles of confederacy were incredibly loose and flimsy. If the south would have won, the north would have reacquired most of those states within 2 decades

      12 years ago at 1:26 am
      1. ScottCHB

        You’re drastically overestimating the gap between the two. It wasn’t as one sided as the run of the mill sixth grade history books will have you believe.

        12 years ago at 5:06 pm
    2. B1GoverSEC

      Wanting america divided is one of the most unpatriotic ludicrous ideas I have heard

      12 years ago at 5:26 pm
    3. Sour_Frat_Kid

      Being cold is like being a pledge and pledges are worthless. The north is cold. Transitive property never lies.

      12 years ago at 9:20 am
    4. yourfavgeed

      ^ that was the most Alabama logic I’ve ever read. Run laps until Jefferson Davis grows a nutsack.

      We should just replace all southeastern state flags with this:

      12 years ago at 12:36 pm
  2. legalizehazing

    Tocqueville individuals are inherently politically weak, compared the the impassioned masses of sheeple “Liberal retards … we must rise in a great concert of common interest and put these losers back in their place. Or WE will end up — LOSING — everything that fucking rocks about this country.

    I know I’ll be damned to an eternal hell of shame by every Patriot of my family that SACRIFICED for my sorry ass if Liberty in America dies on my watch

    12 years ago at 7:12 pm
  3. The Unknown Pledge

    “No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms. The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government”

    — Thomas Jefferson, 1 Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334

    No one is bound to obey an unconstitutional law and no courts are bound to enforce it.

    — 16 Am. Jur. Sec. 177 late 2d, Sec 256

    Fuck. Tyrany.

    12 years ago at 7:32 pm
    1. KAorDIE

      You Sir, are a gentleman and a swag-captain. If more people could express these views in this way there would be far less stupid discussion on this topic. Our government has to fear us. Period.

      12 years ago at 9:47 am
  4. RisingFratstarOfTX

    The most irrefutable point in this is that gun control does not give the public more safety and peace of mind. It makes them more vulnerable to any psychotic shithead who is going to mow down the office. Johnny Crazy can still get a gun illegally, as will every other gangland thug and funny-farm escapee. But those who go through legal channels are having their shield taken away as the sword is on the downswing. The bet thing being done is not a push for gun control, its any and all smart educators and parents shopping for a good-fitting holster.

    12 years ago at 7:48 pm
  5. I’m a solid conservative, but come on man- your a fucking idiot.
    “Those ‘wars’ are all about ratings.” Tell that to the 2,100 American soldiers who died in Afghanistan alone.
    “We are the only people in the history of the world that have the right to bear arms.” Actually, no. That’s guaranteed in the Mexican, Guatemalan, and Haitian Constitutions. (http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/explainer/2010/12/have_gun_want_to_travel.html).
    Not only are you part of the reason our party comes across as behind times and regressive, you’re also misinformed.

    12 years ago at 10:00 pm
  6. frat1990

    But Bush set up the Patriot Act. So it’s a political issue both sides face in order to please society. The Patriot Act took away tons of freedoms, probably more than more gun control could do if we are going off numbers of freedoms and that was obviously done by a conservative President. It was done because the citizens demanded to feel safer which is the same thing happening today. Crazy world fellas.

    12 years ago at 10:31 pm
    1. Hey_rugger

      Bush was no conservative, him and his daddy were both just pawns of the New World Order. When did “conservatism” come to mean a huge federal program taking control of education away from the states, a federal healthcare entitlement expanding medicare to include part D, a 700 billion dollar bailout, massively expanding the size of our standing military – which, guess what, was what the British used to keep the colonists in line (God bless the soldiers, but a standing military can be used against us if the troops are unthinking pawns) – shitting all over the civil and constitutional liberties of We the People through the Patriot Act and several other such acts of congress strongly pushed for and supported by the Bush admin, and starting wars without end against an undefinable foe, “the terrorists” which can now include free thinking libertarians and conservatives. Any firearm owners who love their liberty are now seen by big brother as domestic or right-wing terrorists. Obama can now kill American citizen “terrorists” with drone strikes unilaterally.
      Wake up sheeple, America is no longer free and we are under attack from the police state who want us to be totally under their control. It is time to fight back through information before it comes down to revolution

      12 years ago at 2:31 am