This Ad Of A Retired Navy SEAL Unloading A Mini Gun Won Him The Republican Nomination For Governor
I don’t know anything about the Republican nominee for Missouri Governor, Eric Greitens, other than what I saw in his most recent campaign ad featured below. But from the 30 seconds of what was mostly Greitens unloading a mini gun, I am completely convinced it singlehandedly won him the Republican nod.
Absolute textbook stuff from Greitens here. You want to win a republican nomination? He essentially just gave you the 30-second blueprint. The commercial hit all the right (winged) notes as if it were an elephant with a Jesus heart tattoo wearing a red, white, and blue Dale Earnhardt “3” tank top while playing “The Star-Spangled Banner” on an electric guitar with sparks flying out of the headstock. It was a Ronald Reagan reference away from being full-fledged Republican porn. Rock. Flag. Eag…aw just finished.
Let’s break it down, shall we? A claim that you’re under attack from the oppressive tyranny of one Barack Obama whether completely genuine or not? That’s a must. Get every last drop of milk from that cow’s overworked udders while you still can.
A casual mention that you’re a Bronze Star and Purple Heart recipient? As I tell my Afghanistan veteran roommate everyday, “Thank you for your service.” Talk about a card to play. If there’s one complaint I have with the ad, it’s that the reference to those accolades was entirely too subtle. Greitens campaign slogan should just be “I got shot for your freedom,” and I’m almost certain his Republican opponents would have been required by the party’s bylaws to concede the nomination. Pretty sure that’s how it works.
“He’ll defend the 2nd amendment,” while spending the entire commercial spraying bullets into the horizon with no regard for life? Hammer, meet nail. Then to close it out by plastering the words “Patriot” and “Conservative” into the final shot was just the cherry atop of the perfectly constructed Republican sundae to get it engrained into the voters heads that incase you forgot about the whole “taking a fucking flesh wound during his service” thing, this dude really loves our country — minus the government. Really no surprise Greitens locked down the nomination in a state that’s home to the Ozarks..
Image via Youtube
Reading your articles feels like being water boarded
10 years ago at 5:01 pmSounds like a deserving man
10 years ago at 5:07 pmI ski every weekend… W/ my nose.
10 years ago at 5:27 pmWrong article bud.
10 years ago at 5:49 pmEric Greitens is the Brian Williams of the SEAL Teams. He has lied about his service record to gain fame and sell publications. Many fellow SEALs, including those who served with him, have been outspoken about his dishonesty.
10 years ago at 5:40 pmsources?
10 years ago at 5:44 pmA quick Google search suffices. However, in response to the defamation, he released his military service records (over 100 pages), not to mention the guy has the accolades to back it up. None of that matters though since the accusation was made in a youtube video with an anonymous creator, so there is no credibility at the moment.
10 years ago at 6:46 pmhttp://themissouritimes.com/27600/navy-seals-claim-credit-for-video-critical-of-greitens/
It’s actually not completely false information. This article sums up pretty well why a lot of SEALs have issue with him and some of his claims. Also, part of their code involves not seeking recognition for being a SEAL, which is literally all the dude does in any of his ads.
I respect the guy because he served and all that but when that many people come out calling your claims as at least somewhat bullshit there probably is something to it.
10 years ago at 9:59 pmIt does seem like they only are critical of him because he doesn’t hold the brotherhood values that nearly all SEALs hold. That is pretty fucking shitty if you ask me, but the only claim that they made against his military record was that he served as a SEAL on a marine team. That is a fair point that he never served on a SEAL platoon, but the article points out that there were more SEALs at that point than there were spots on missions. The guy making money off of his service and using it for publicity clearly goes against the code of conduct of most men who serve as a SEAL, but that doesn’t make him a liar, just a douche.
10 years ago at 10:24 pmI mean even in his douchiest moments, he has done more for this nation than 99% of the population, and the much of the military. Until you have served with the SEALs or been one, you really don’t have the right to criticize their behavior under their ethos.
10 years ago at 9:05 amThe guys who are criticizing him are SEALs…
10 years ago at 10:22 amClearly not the criticizing I am talking about dumbass.
10 years ago at 2:11 pmSounds like Greitens is a fucktard that’s just riding the coat tails of real Navy SEALS
10 years ago at 10:02 amYou are sounding dangerously like a disgruntled liberal, tubby
10 years ago at 1:33 pm