This Ranking Of The Most Patriotic States In America Is…Interesting

The World Cup may be over, but America still has an Independence Day to celebrate, which means we have one more day to unite under the Stars and Stripes before we all go back to calling each other gay, hipster, atheist, child murder advocates and fundamentalist, woman hating, child murder advocates. At least the one thing we can all agree upon is that kids should die, now if only we could decide whether it should be by guns or abortions.

But hey, screw it, let’s start arguing now, specifically over who loves America the most. That seems productive.

Movoto Real Estate collected data from all 50 states and came away with a ranking of what they believe to be the most patriotic states in the country. Here’s the map and the list:



Sort of a weird ranking, considering most of their top 10 states tried to, this one time, you know, leave the United States forever. That isn’t to say a lot can’t change in 150 years, it’s just a bit ironic that South Carolina, the first state to secede, arguably the most enthusiastic state about secession, and the state that fired the first shots against their countrymen, is somehow the most patriotic state in the Union. Is this the largest case of Stockholm Syndrome ever recorded? Is South Carolina the Rihanna to America’s Chris Brown? You could ask those same questions about the entire southeast in general, actually.

That’s all (mostly) in jest, of course. Southerners are about as patriotic as they come here in the states, even if a lot of them own two very conflicting flags. Regardless, I love them for it.

While the south being the most patriotic might be ironic, it certainly isn’t a surprise. Neither is seeing California come in dead last at number 50. As much as the rest of the country likes to give Texas crap for considering itself its own country, there is no other state that gives less of a fuck about the rest of the USA than California, and it’s not even close, really. Texans — mostly native Texans — love to talk about how great Texas is. Californians — especially transplants to California — have full on verbal circle jerks about where they live.

The rest of the results are kind of random. Maine, for example, is second. Sure? It doesn’t seem wrong, so whatever. Also, it looks like Movoto confused Missouri, Michigan, and Mississippi and switched their rankings. Missouri is at 20, Michigan at 45, and Mississippi at 36.

Agree? Disagree? Wanna fight about it?

[via Movoto]

    1. duckdog

      My first thought was “Not Surprised”, but I like your assessment of the situation.

      10 years ago at 12:17 pm
    2. MYpaddle_YOURass

      #2 in funds for your veterans so watch your mouth, son. Just divide my State into sevenths already.

      10 years ago at 12:37 pm
      1. PKP_1904_SC

        #2 in funds doesn’t mean shit when you’re at least 30th in every other category, son. Lace up and walk off a cliff.

        10 years ago at 11:26 am
  1. BulletproofTiger

    Didn’t look that extensively- but I can’t be the only one that is bothered by the fact that Alaska is #1 in veterans per capita, while 45th in veteran funds.

    10 years ago at 12:16 pm
    1. Dick_Nixon

      Just my take on it, but since Alaska has such a low population, they could have a lot of veterans which would make the per capita rate higher. This doesn’t necessarily mean that each veteran is individually more underfunded than in other states, it could just mean that the overall amount of funding is lower because for example, South Carolina could have a lower per capita but more veterans overall than Alaska.

      10 years ago at 12:30 pm
    2. JohnFratYatesSommers

      Well you’d have to know more about the methodology before getting mad. I would suspect Alaska is #1 in vets per capita because it has a tiny population which brings out unusual outliers like that. If their veterans spending is low just because of the tiny population, that’s not really a problem, but if “veteran funds rank” is talking about money spent on veterans **per capita** then we’ve got a problem.

      10 years ago at 12:31 pm
      1. puffdaddy

        Also, just by the nature of Alaska, I assume a small portion if any of Alaska’s vets are homeless. All you need to have a home in Alaska is an axe and the ability to cut down a tree.

        Source: lived in Alaska for three months.

        10 years ago at 12:35 pm
    3. That PhiPhi guy

      Alaska is a veterans paradise, room too shoot things freely and pretty much do whatever the fuck they want. It’s a retiree state.

      10 years ago at 1:28 pm
    4. Beecher1843

      Yeah I think its skewed because its a total number, not an average number. Alaska is very low in veterans funds. Most of these aren’t per capita, so I think most of these need to be taken with a grain of salt. Also, given that there mostly total numbers, its sad that California, the number 1 state in population, still finished last.

      10 years ago at 2:05 pm
    1. FUBAR1776

      True. The south loved America so much that they had to leave America to save America from America so that the Americans wouldn’t turn into England….so you’re welcome.

      10 years ago at 12:20 pm
      1. MrSaturdayNite

        Which is funny when you consider the southern gentlemen wore their hair long like the royal courts of Europe and Jefferson Davis actually appealed to England for help during the Civil War. So, actually, the South had a raging royal boner that was about as anti-America as Title IX

        10 years ago at 12:24 pm
      2. FUBAR1776

        If you ever question yourself as to why you don’t get laid, please refer to you previous statement.

        10 years ago at 12:32 pm
      3. TrustMeImPre_Med

        Also during the Revolutionary War, the South had the most loyalists, many of whom moved back to England during the War…but we’ll turn a blind eye to that too.

        10 years ago at 1:27 pm
    1. Devil n A Saint

      Seeing as it houses both Marine and Navy special operations, the largest Marine Corps bases, and Marine Corps Depot? #2 in Veteran funds? At least give southern California its own consideration.

      10 years ago at 2:11 pm
    1. Kentucky Chi guy

      I mean if you don’t think so,I hear there is a great resort in Chernobyl that serves unlimited bleach and tonic drinks all day that you could check out?

      10 years ago at 12:50 pm
  2. emergingfratstar296

    I get the veterans part of loving america, but google searches for “american flag” is one of the scores?

    10 years ago at 12:18 pm