VIDEO: Wild Intersection Brawl Breaks Out In Houston

Bogey Wells9 years ago

My father tells me quite often, “Nobody thinks this way, but just by birth, you won the lottery.” It took me many years to understand what he meant.

Once I became an adult and realized the abundance of trash that populates this planet, I really came to understand why he would tell me that so often. Is it slightly elitest? Possibly. Do I care? Not at all. I’ve been privileged to live in a bubble, away from the dregs of society that like to slug it out in the middle of busy intersections. That’s certainly one interaction I’ve never experienced, and one I was more than happy to live vicariously through thanks to the Twitter account @MrPoonSoaker.

This fight between four humans crawling out of the cess pool of humanity is one of the most trashtastic things I’ve ever seen. It reportedly went down on Hwy 290 and Hwy 6 in Houston, TX, and started after the blue truck wished to merge and the white car refused entry.

For the most part, it appeared as if none of the participants truly wanted to brawl except for the big gal in the back, quickly burning through all the energy her 15,000 calorie lunch could generate.

Aaaaaannnnnddddd, we have escalation…

They act shocked that the black and Mexican guy took offense to Bart planting his heel in their hood as his human bowling ball berates them from the passenger window. Who would’ve fucking guessed?! It’s as if being white trash assholes maliciously damaging a man’s vehicle is worthy of getting your ass beat, and getting his ass beat is exactly how it went down for ol’ Bart.

And just as we thought the two parties would be peacefully returning to their single-wides and analog televisions, Bart feels one last burst of adrenaline. One that just pushes him over the edge. He had to get that one last “fuck you” blow in on those low-lives who dared to keep him from merging. He got that blow, along with yet another charge when the Houston police inevitably drag his ass to Harris County Jail.

Stay classy, Houston..

Image via Twitter