Washington State Adding Friday Classes And Calling Parents To Combat Binge Drinking
From The Spokesman-Review:
Washington State University will take new steps to try to reduce binge drinking and drug use by students, including scheduling more Friday morning classes and notifying parents if an underage student is caught drinking or using drugs, university officials announced Monday.
More like Washington State High School. Right, guys?
This certainly seems like pretty drastic measures to take to attempt combatting underage and binge drinking on a college campus. It may shed some light on how this decision transpired after learning that a WSU student died from alcohol poisoning in October. That’s a sad deal, obviously, but would an 8am Friday class or the threat of Dad getting a call at work about his kid getting caught with a case of beer or a spliff have prevented it? I don’t know, but it seems unlikely.
The WSU administration thinks it could help, and they have research to back it up.
“Robust research shows that parents can have a significant influence on their children’s drinking habits,” said Melynda Huskey, WSU dean of students. “Rather than using parental notification as a scare tactic, we view it as an opportunity to involve parents in the process of reducing harm.”
[…]
A 2007 study by the University of Missouri found that students were more likely to binge on Thursday nights if they didn’t have classes on Friday.
There’s an earth-shattering revelation if I’ve ever seen one.
So, how would your dad react if he got a call from a school administrator saying you were caught with alcohol…while in college?
School Admin: “Sir, I regret to inform you that your son is currently sitting in my office. He was found walking across campus with a bottle of bourbon this morning.”
Dad: “What?! Really? You’ve got to be joking. You talking about Charlie? Unbelievable! He’s in third grade! The little shit is like 10 years old. How’d he get his hands on hard liquor? It makes me wonder what kind of hoodlums go to that school.”
School Admin: “Oh, I’m sorry sir. I didn’t realize you had more than one son. I’m actually talking about Christopher. I’m calling from Washington State University.”
Dad: “Oh, but Chris is in college…”
School Admin: “I understand that, but Christopher is a minor.”
Dad: “College.”
School Admin: “Right.”
Dad: “Right.”
School Admin: “Have a good day, sir.”
[via The Spokesman-Review]
NO PLEASE DON’T CALL MY DAD. He’ll beat me if he finds out I was drinking vodka and soda like a pussy.
13 years ago at 4:31 pmSounds like the administration could use some solid hazing.
13 years ago at 5:03 pmI know a few Wazzu grads. Let’s just say they could use some more time in the classroom…
13 years ago at 5:14 pmThat is what happens when like six kids die from alcohol related deaths in a year!
13 years ago at 5:22 pmliterally no idea where you got that number from. To my knowledge, 1 kid died last year.
13 years ago at 5:56 pmThey’ve been doing this shit at my school since my freshman year and, you guesses, it did absolutely nothing
13 years ago at 6:14 pmHoly shit I fucked that up
13 years ago at 6:17 pm^ It’s ok, pal. Just take a couple laps.
13 years ago at 6:55 pmTCM- Total Cunt Move
13 years ago at 6:20 pmNo surprise that someone named “Huskey” is the fucking buzzkill. Fuck Huskey and Fuck the Huskies.
13 years ago at 10:39 pmI would like to provide a more realistic conversation.
School Admin: “Sir, I regret to inform you that your son is currently sitting in my office. He was found walking across campus with a bottle of bourbon this morning.”
Dad: “What?! Really?
School Admin: “Really. Would you like to have a word with him about his actions.”
Dad: “Yes please… But first, what brand?”
School Admin: “Excuse me sir?”
Dad: “What brand of Bourbon was he drinking?”
School Admin: “Uhh… it says here that it was Red Stag.”
Dad: “I see… please put him on the phone.”
School Admin: (confused) “Here you are sir.”
Son: “Yes.”
Dad: “Is this true that you were drinking?
Son: “Yes.”
Dad: “Is this the first time you have been caught?”
Son: “Yes.”
Dad: ” (explicitive ommited) I will have no son of mine drinkind like a (racial slur ommited)! I am going to tell the nice/ignorant Dean whatever that I am on my way to pick you up and have a father/son talk. What we will be doing is that I am going to take you to the nearest liquor store, then we will go to the fraternity house where I will deliver you to your pledge master and watch as I instruct him on how to make sure he is teaching his pledges how to drink like a man. No son of mine will drink cheap Burbon! Do you understand me!”
Son: “yes sir.”
Dad: “Good, now put me back on the line with buzzkill Mr. Mc (explictitive ommited) for brains.”
School Admin: “Yes sir.”
Dad: “I will be arriving at the College this afternoon. Thank you so very much for your concern for my son’s well being. I deeply appreciate all that you have done to keep. (pretends to tear up) my little boy safe from harm. We will have a very stern talk and I will ensure that he learns a lesson from this.”
School Admin: “We do our best sir.”
Dad: “Right.”
School Admin: “Have a good day, sir.”
Dad: “Oh I will.”
13 years ago at 1:19 pmIm 12 and I just snorted so much marawana and ate 4 beers. I hav drinken cocaine 400 times. Fite me. PLS RESPOND DERN
13 years ago at 1:15 amYeah I’m pretty sure sharing third party information regarding educational information, including punishments, is a violation of FERPA. Did their legal counsel vet this or is this another fucking layer of idiocy on top of the proposal in general?
13 years ago at 8:23 am