Watching Bret Bielema Attempting To Swing A Golf Club Is More Enjoyable Than Watching Arkansas Football
9 years ago

Brett Bielema

Arkansas football coach and total idiot Bret Bielema is good at a lot of things on the football field, but there are a few things he probably doesn’t have a future in. Swimsuit modeling? Can probably rule that one out. Politician? He’s got a mouth like Trump with the popularity of an SEC women’s basketball preseason analysis show, so I doubt he can pull that one off, either.

But I’m fairly confident he has a better shot at being either of those things before he earns an invite to a PGA event. I mean, look at this abortion of a golf swing. It’s atrocious.

His golf swing is about as graceful as a hyper-anxious mule with a bucket stuck on its head running through gunfire in war-torn Syria. And look at those damn sandals he’s wearing. It’s golf, Bret. Have some respect.

I can’t stop laughing at this video. It’s like he is trying to move as fast as he can in an attempt to cover up how awful his swing looks. And that posture, holy shit. I know golf is an enjoyable game for even mediocre players, but you’ve got to assume he’s just not having a good time out there. I mean, drinking can only compensate for so much.

I have a six-year-old niece. She has played tee ball for one season and has zero interest in sports — except for a set of toy golf clubs she likes to swing around the house. I have a feeling that if I put a real golf club in her hand and made her go 1 v. 1 with Bret Bielema at Augusta, she’d have a fighting chance to beat him by at least 2.5 strokes.

College football can’t get here soon enough. If for no other reason than to get Bielema off the golf course.

  2. Fraddington_bear

    Steve I honestly thought you had died, I haven’t been this disappointed since I found out hookers don’t accept Jimmy Johns coupons as payment.

    9 years ago at 1:39 pm
  6. FSULegend

    Steve, I just want you to know that sometimes I masturbate to the thought of you getting brutally gangraped by 5 black guys with footlong dicks.

    9 years ago at 2:21 pm
    3. FSULegend

      Wtf how come when other people tell Steve and Wally incredibly fucked up shit they get dozens of likes but when I do it I’m “one messed up dude”

      9 years ago at 2:40 pm
      2. FSULegend

        And it’s not when somebody told Wally that he got off to the thought of clipping Wally’s toes off with gardening shears? Dude got like over a hundred likes. Anyways, I apologize Steve.

        9 years ago at 2:55 pm
  8. Fratillac21

    Oh Steven, here are some things you will not have any chance at an actual career in. Swimsuit modeling, because let’s be honest, you haven’t lifted a weight since that time you went with the “meathead brother” freshman year. He died from a testicular torsion 2 years ago and you weren’t brave enough to tell him about it while you were down there. Here’s another, writing anything decent for a single RESPECTABLE website other than this shitty Internet blog for wanna be high school frat stars and people like me who want to kill themselves cause we tried in school and are graduating early. All of your try hard comparisons are like Marty McFly trying to turn his movie in to a reality show so he can go back in time and stop himself from getting Parkinson’s. Which is something I would actually look at. Unlike your shitty far to long commentary on a good quality video of a good golf shot. Yeah the form is terrible but when have you not double bogeyed every hole. Take a step back, and I don’t mean to the black tee box, but far enough so the other TFM writer’s cocks don’t jam you in the eye as they give you a nice bukkake rain dance as you sit there like an eager little starter Pokemon waiting to get picked so you will finally be useful for something. And that only use being to catch the cum before it hits the floor so Wally doesn’t have to use Jtrain’s rag to wipe it up again. Have some fucking respect.

    9 years ago at 5:43 pm
    1. AndrewsMomsAss

      I think this is where one of you boys always say, “Do waaay less!”

      9 years ago at 5:47 pm