In Honor Of Flag Day, Here Are 196 Countries’ Flags, Ranked

196. Nepal
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Nepal doesn’t have two nickels to rub together to afford enough fabric to create a proper rectangular flag. This is the safety flag parents put on the bike of their 12-year-old son who still rocks a helmet and never graduated from training wheels. His fellow classmates ruthlessly make fun of his speech impediment and his uncle diddled him in the game closet on more than one occasion. Nepal might as well end it all.

195. France
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194. Japan
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Looks like the used flow pad of the most precise spotting vagina ever.

193. Brazil

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I feel like I caught Zika with one glance at their flag.

192. – 138. Africa
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With mass genocide, disease, and poverty ravaging the entire continent’s population, and the only two viable career paths being child soldier or blood diamond miner, pirating is suddenly not so bad of a stigma to have or flag to fly.

137. Bangladesh
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Christmas Japan minus the cheer, gifts, and Jesus.

136. – 123. Middle East
middleeast

122. China
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Only their little child labor slave hands could bring the wonders of Apple to life.

121. North Korea
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Would it even shock you if Un actually changed the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea’s flag to this piece of modern art?

120. Georgia
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You caught me. I tried to slip in the flag of Georgia the state and not the country. But good luck finding anything about that insignificant piece of land other than their inability to steer a glorified sled. Never forget Nodar Kumaritashvili.

119. Switzerland
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Even on their country’s flag, they sit in the middle. Choose a side for me one time, Switzerland.

118. – 90. The Caribbean
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Just when they finally get wifi back up at the community center after four years, they get blasted back to the stone age by another category-5.

89. – 6. Rest of the world not in the top 5
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Notable mentions: Germany 1933-1945, glass bottle Coca Cola, and the Toronto Maple Leafs Heart Disease Awareness alternative jerseys.

5. Saint Pierre and Miquelon
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Now that right there, that’s a thing of beauty.

4. Texas
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3. United States
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Old Glory locks down number three. But what could possibly be better, Dan?

2. The Moon
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The American flag on steroids.

1. Vatican City
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God makes no mistakes.

Images via Shutterstock

  1. SteveHoltOnDrugs

    Surprised DeVry didn’t write an article ranking the shapes of flags.

    8 years ago at 4:34 pm
    1. Jared Borislow

      Nepal comes in last, all the others are in a tie for first. #NoSquigglies

      8 years ago at 9:21 am
  2. Fratcatinthehat

    Ok let’s be fucking real here Dan you fascist, Stars and Bars is number 2 no questions asked. The American flag is number 1. You inbred bimbo fuck chug bleach.

    8 years ago at 5:16 pm
    1. Dan Regester

      Rocking the confederate flag is like wearing the super bowl shirts of the losing team that get sent to Africa.

      8 years ago at 5:44 pm
      1. Fratcatinthehat

        You fat, cum dumpster fuck, how does Vatican City, a city so insignificant to American life no one could point it out on a map, have, in your opinion, a better flag than the USA??

        8 years ago at 9:45 am
      2. Dan Regester

        Because I believe the white trash tattoo goes “God, Family, Country” in that order.

        8 years ago at 10:05 am
  3. Yurtle the Frat Turtle

    There are a lot of great things about Switzerland, also their flag is a huge plus

    8 years ago at 6:48 pm
  4. Harry S. Truman

    You can go ahead and make Japan’s flag the same as France’s. You’re welcome.

    8 years ago at 6:51 pm
  5. Bro-hann Sebastian Bach

    Harrison would have made this several pages. At least I didn’t have to waste multiple clicks to see that this article was worthless

    8 years ago at 7:08 pm
  6. Big Dumb Idiot

    Did you just put a bunch of Catholic fucks above the United States of America?

    8 years ago at 9:39 pm