Subway Employees Rub Junk On Bread, Freeze Piss

Did anyone order a cockmeat sandwich? No? I didn’t think so. Two Subway employees in Columbus, Ohio decided to go on ahead and pioneer the new sandwich anyway, which was then posted on Instagram under the handle @ianjett. The other employee apparently bottled and froze his own piss, beating Bear Grylls to the punch and providing what I assume he thought would be a refreshing side drink to his co-worker’s new creation.

Seriously though, stop licking/fucking/sexually harassing our meals before you prepare them, poorly paid teenagers working in the food industry. I know I wouldn’t want my own dick in my sandwich, so I certainly don’t want your dick there. This rash of food-related fuckery is really getting out of control. I, for one, don’t want to live in a world where I fear that my sandwich could have had a little “extra mayo” added to it before being served.

To be fair to the food-defiling employees, they claim it didn’t happen at work, because that would be disgusting. Doing it at home and Instagramming it, though? Totally cool in their books.

[via Huffington Post]

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  1. BoomhauerKDR

    These kids probably hear people complain all the time about how subway doesn’t put enough meat on their sandwiches, so they took matters into their own hands.

    13 years ago at 11:01 am
  2. Alex_Moran_2096

    Those employees probably got dicked around a lot by their manager, which would explain why they were so pissed off I guess.

    13 years ago at 1:33 pm
  3. therealmccoy94

    These fast food employees need to stop dicking around and just make the goddamn food.

    13 years ago at 1:35 pm