The Official 2016 Frat Bracket: Round Of 32
Forget March Madness; this is March Fratness. The most fraternal objects, concepts, and actions, all duking it out to see what will reign supreme as 2016’s most frat thing — 100% decided by all of you. After a first round of head-to-heads that was chock-full of upsets, we are now onto the round of 32.
Let’s get to our first region.
Note: Bracket regions are named after the four main frat regions in a purely ceremonial manner. The things listed under them do not necessarily have any specific relationship with that respective frat region.
The East Coast Region
#1 Natural Light vs. #9 Patagonia
While #1 Natty cruised to an easy victory over #16 Philanthropy, #9 Patagonia staged a runaway victory over #8 Chick-fil-A. I’m not going to call a 9 seed beating an 8 seed an upset, but the margin of victory (Patagonia took 71% of the vote) was pretty astonishing. Can Fratagonia ride that wave and take down perennial juggernaut Natural Light in the round of 32? This is a frat matchup (fratchup™) to watch.
[poll id=”66″]
#2 Golf vs. #10 Red cups
“Wagon Wheel” is officially dead, and #10 Red cups killed it. In a contest that was never in doubt, everyone’s favorite frat jam has proven that it is no longer a powerhouse. If you have a heart, you’ll pour some out for this homie dead and gone. And, if red cups can’t pull off a major upset and take down 2 seed golf, it looks like we’ll be pouring some out for them as well when the sweet sixteen bracket comes out.
[poll id=”67″]
#3 Embezzlement vs. #11 Intramural sports
14 seed Going stag to formal put up an incredibly honorable fight in its round of 64 matchup against #3 Embezzlement, but, in the end, it just wasn’t enough to upset the 3 seed. IM sports, on the other hand, proved they deserved a higher seed with their handily-won matchup vs. #6 Not paying dues. Call me crazy, but I can easily see the 11 seed pulling this matchup off. Do you believe in Cinderellas?
[poll id=”68″]
#4 Cocaine vs. #12 Public urination
Kudos to #12 Public urination for taking down #5 Mopeds. As they progress from speed bumps to key bumps, though, the path gets a whole lot tougher for nature peeing. Luck of the draw did not help out public urination, as cocaine is probably the strongest 4 seed out there. But hey — they pulled off an upset once, they can do it again.
[poll id=”69″]


Did Total Frat Move even make the NIT?
10 years ago at 10:29 amSuprised they didn’t throw rowdy gentleman on this bracket and stuff the ballot box all the way to the ‘ship.
10 years ago at 11:35 amNarrowly escaping an Archer upset bid early on
10 years ago at 12:23 pmHazing lost in the first round? I’ve lost all faith in this Frat Bracket….
10 years ago at 10:32 amNot only did it not lose in the first round, but it’s currently looking like it’s going to win the second. Possibly even the third. You don’t real so well, do you boy?
10 years ago at 10:40 amYou don’t spell too well, do you boy?
10 years ago at 10:49 amI won’t even bother with stretching…I just start running…
10 years ago at 10:56 amI’m going Whiskey over Not Pulling Out, because if you DO pull out you can jizz on her face though.
10 years ago at 10:49 amI expect a George Mason type run for Intramural Sports. Highly underseeded.
10 years ago at 10:51 amJim Larranaga. FAF.
10 years ago at 3:38 pmCouldn’t have said it better myself
10 years ago at 11:11 pmIt helps that IM sports had such an easy draw into the Sweet 16 though. Embezzlement and Not Paying Dues? Come on man. Those aren’t frat…
10 years ago at 5:03 pmAgreed, but would IM sports have been seeded higher if drunk? That minor distinction could make all the difference.
10 years ago at 9:38 pmThis is the best thing this website has ever produced.
10 years ago at 10:55 amI will probably get lapped for this but I think pledges should have been a solid seed. Obviously they’re pledges so the fucking suck, but at the end of the day if we didn’t have pledges we’d just be walking into a social group.
10 years ago at 10:58 amDon’t tell them that, you pussy. Besides, hazing is up there. What’s hazing without pledges?
10 years ago at 11:14 amI hate not picking at least one underdog but I feel Natty Light and Hazing play for the Ship here and Hazing beats natty. Mostly through the use of obscenities and rage fueled by Natty light.
10 years ago at 10:58 amAdderal vs Keystone Light is probably the hardest call i’ve had to make in 4 years of college
10 years ago at 11:19 amWait until we get Natty vs cocaine in the next round
10 years ago at 1:01 pmIt’s fucking cocaine. You show me a man who’ll take a Natty briefcase over an eightball and i’ll show you a liar.
10 years ago at 2:47 pmgotta go with the blow. I’ll take a big gator tail of disco dust over drinking alcoholic water any day.
10 years ago at 2:20 amKeystone could easily be replaced with any number of shitty beers, but Addy only has a rival in cocaine which IS seeded higher. No pun intended.
10 years ago at 9:40 pmI cant believe cigs got knocked out in the first round.
10 years ago at 11:27 amIt was disappointing, but a loss to republicanism is respectable. Maybe next year?
10 years ago at 2:23 pmTough draw in the first round, but republicanism locked that one up early.
10 years ago at 9:41 pmLooks like Steve Holt got “Fired!” Hah ha I’m going to put that on Facebook!
10 years ago at 11:36 am