The 2017 Wife Mock Draft

TheChampionsTour7 years ago

Becca Thomas

School: University of Alabama
Hometown: Atlanta, GA
House: Top Tier
Major: Communications
GPA: 2.6
Hair color: Blonde
Height: 5′10
Weight: 140 lbs.
Cup Size: B (a handful)

Pros:
– A hard eight on her worst day.
– Can wear a little black dress with the best of them.
– President of her sorority.
– Crimson Cabaret captain. A picture of her during the national championship game got 400 RTs.

Cons:
– Like her pert rack, she’s a handful. High maintenance.
– Her last boyfriend had a written set of rules like “You can’t hang out with your friends if I’m not busy” and “You MUST text me before bed every night.” Psycho shit.
– Sloppy drunk.
– Insane jealous streak. Has three busted out tail lights and one smashed windshield on her resume.

Projected: 1st round bust

Outlook: On paper, she’s a dream woman. Beneath the surface, she’s Taylor Swift on steroids. A succubus who will suck dry the soul of any man who attempts to tame her. Don’t you dare try anything crazy, because she will undoubtedly outdo you.